Parkinson’s Law states that in any Bureaucracy “work expands so as to fill the time available for its completion.” I would go one step further and postulate that work in today’s Bureaucratic world expands to create useless jobs for all the parasites that have no useful work to do. It is all due to that four letter word that everyone is in love with, including the fictional Master Twist: MORE! Yes “MORE” is a four letter word, and a damned expensive one at that. Aside from our own personal endeavor for MORE, for which we are willing to pay, there is the ubiquitous MORE required by our Government and our “MY MORE” society. I will cite an example, give a few of the useless MORES involved and let your imagination, and your wallet, fill in the blanks.
My (X) Great Grand Daddy (where X is the number of “Great”s required to reach the proper generation), had his horse stolen in 1807. The horse was a descendant of a pair of wild horses that my XGGD caught and tamed. He raised the victim horse on his ranch that he ran with the help of his family. Total cost of the horse: $0. My XGGD and X-1GGD tracked down and caught the thief in about an hour. Total cost of the apprehension: $0 Elapsed time since the crime; 1 hour. The two hung the culprit from the nearest tree, dug his grave, took him down, buried him, took their rope and shovels and rode home. Cost of trial, sentencing, execution and burial: $0. Elapsed time: 2 hours (including the stop at the Marshal’s Office to report the crime, the trial, the conviction, the sentencing, and the punishment). The Marshal’s comment: “Thank you kindly Jebadiah, I didn’t want to get out in this weather nohow.” Total cost of the exercise to my XGGD: $0. Total elapsed time from crime to punishment, including paperwork: 3 hours. Total cost to the tax payers: $0.
Fast Forward to 2007. My car was stolen. I chased the illegal immigrant who did the dastardly deed across three States (actually it was less than 10 miles. Lucky I didn’t live at Four Corners as I would have had one more State and one Indian Nation with which to contend). He totaled the car and was killed in the process. I went home, called the Insurance Company to report the loss, called 911 to report the theft, went with the Sheriff when he came to arrest me for murder, stood four criminal trials (one in each State for murder or attempted murder plus one in Federal Court for transporting illegal immigrants across State lines) and one civil trial–the family of the deceased wanted what was left of my MORE. I am now doing four consecutive terms of 25 to life. Total cost of the exercise to me: $All I Had. Total elapsed time: four times 25 to life. Total cost to you, the taxpayers: MORE!
What is the difference? First look at the similarities: 1) two crimes were committed; 2) the perpetrators were apprehended; 3) the criminals were tried; 4) the criminals were sentenced; 5) the criminals were punished; 6) the victims went home. The similarity ends there. Now the difference: look to Parkinson’s Law as modified to suit the times. In XGGD’s day everybody, except the useless horse thief, was engaged in meaningful work necessary to meet their own needs and sustain their own lives. They didn’t have the time nor the inclination to get out in the weather. They were too busy working their meaningful jobs to bother being Mr. and Mrs. Goodytwoshoes with XGGD’s life. “Your horse got stole, too bad. You hung the bastard? Good on your bod!” Add MORE. MORE people means MORE work but there are less meaningful jobs available due to the technological revolution. Do we create less people? Hell no! We create MORE meaningless jobs, paid for by MORE taxes, MORE costs for everything. “Your car got stole? You bastard, my insurance rates will go up.” “You chased him instead of calling the cops? You trying to put us cops out of a job chasing the perps?” “You have to go to Court? Hot Damn! You are caught in the MORE system now!” “You will never get out cause we need MORE! MORE! MORE!” And my name isn’t even OJ.
I think you will get the message and fill in the blanks. If you disagree, just how much of the MORE do you take home? How much MORE is taken out of your MORE for some other parasite’s MORE?
We should all praise the Lady of Color who named her boys Eenie, Meeny, Mieny, and Jack. She didn’t want no Mo’.
18 Comments
December 11, 2007 at 10:15 am
The Good Old Days or the Good Life?
I tried but I couldn’t find a place for this in the dissertation so here is MORE.
My XGGD used his mule’s ass for a compass as he pulled his plow down the row of corn he used to make his own moonshine.
My Grandson uses his GPS to steer his Lexus to the nearest Starbucks where he buys his designer coffee.
I’ll take the mule any day.
December 11, 2007 at 10:59 am
Interesting. My XXXXgrandfather was also hung for a horse thief in Nebraska, around 1810 or so.
Only problem was, it wasn’t him.
Fast forward to today. The only measure of economic success we use is the GROWTH of the economy. As if an economy can grow endlessly.
We should be expecting a rebound of shrinkage at some point, like when the resources used to grow are shrunk to the point where they begin to run out.
The entire premise of our economic system is bullhsit.
I’d rather live like the Native Americans did before the whites invaded and imposed their culture.
December 11, 2007 at 10:59 am
Good article Clyde…I agree with the mule idea….BTW. In one of my past post’s somewhere I wrote a short article about an intresting old guy I met in Montana…..He was one of the last in a small group of men who hung the last horse thief in Montana….I think I was born 100 year’s to late..Their kind of justice, 100 year’s ago seemed better some how..Blessings
December 11, 2007 at 11:08 am
RU,
You are exactly correct. Our economic system is a big Ponzi scheme. Infinite greed and finite resources.
December 11, 2007 at 12:06 pm
I understand your point about MORE, Clyde. In fact, I did a research paper this semester on our overconsumption, and encourage people to live more simply.
But even in 1807 people in this country had Constitutional rights. Frontier “justice” may have been monetarily cheaper, but it was far too costly in terms of civil rights.
As long as our cowardly lawmakers continue to pass vague laws, trying to please everyone and get re-elected, we will have a monstrous bureaucracy. Sadly, I don’t see any change on the horizon.
Personally, I’ll take the bureaucracy over the possibility of hanging the wrong guy.
December 11, 2007 at 1:23 pm
Hanging somebody for stealing? We’re sounding a pretty conservative here.
December 11, 2007 at 2:19 pm
We have embarked on one of the classic debates of our time. Unfortunately, we seem to have adopted the modern concept of “digital” and overlooked the proven “analog” concept. The digital solution says that two approaches are mutually exclusive–one or the other, Baby. Your liberal end of the dichotomy or my conservative end. The analog solution says that the two approaches can be mutually existent. Lets meet in the middle, Baby and settle down on my continuum. The two approaches, as I tried to point out in addition to our compulsive consumption, are the concepts of Civil Rights and Property Rights. Now the liberals want all their civil rights plus the conservatives’ property. The conservatives want all their property plus the liberals’ civil rights. Where is the middle? I don’t know. What I do know is that if the thief had recognized the property rights of XGGD and hadn’t stolen the horse he wouldn’t be dead (after 200 years he might be dead of natural causes though). Is that a conservative view? Maybe, maybe not. I also know that if the thief recognized the civil responsibility that comes with his civil rights he would not have stolen the horse and he wouldn’t be dead, again with the 200 year caveat. Is that a liberal view? Maybe, maybe not. I hesitate to pronounce my true feeling on the matter because, like all of us they bounce up and down the scale depending on the situation. Just hang the guilty bastard! or Give him the damn horse, it’s only good for glue anyway. Besides you can write it off your taxes.
December 11, 2007 at 2:27 pm
But our justice system was instituted under the premise that it’s better for 10 guilty men to walk free than for one innocent to be convicted. What if the guy holding the horse is not the guy who stole him but some guy who found him running loose and was trying to feed him and give him some water so save his life? It’s like the prisoners we hold endlessly and torture now that we are supposed to believe on blind faith are guilty of something otherwise they wouldn’t be held.
December 11, 2007 at 2:56 pm
In my opinion, Clyde, it’s not a “hang him” or “give him the horse” issue. It’s a “charge him” or “let him go” issue.
Our Constitution was written with the very clear memory of the power of a King, and the accompanying abuses of power.
Admittedly, a horse was more to a family in those days than a recreational vehicle, so stealing a horse was a serious crime.
Like Shayne, I’d rather see a guilty man go free, than see an innocent man hanged.
December 11, 2007 at 3:07 pm
Shayne,
I don’t disagree with what you are saying at all. One of the big problems we have as individuals, groups, mobs, Nations, Worlds is that we always want to judge others by our standards. The Jews don’t eat pork because it is unclean. Christians who eat pork are therefore unclean. Moslem’s eat sheep and ride camels. Therefore the religion folks that supports riding sheep and eating camels are perverts. In 1807 the thief knew that if he stole the horse he would be subjected to “Frontier Justice.” He made the choice and it is not our place to judge the hangers by our “Convoluted Justice.” The old sayings: “If you can’t stand the heat get out of the kitchen” and “If you can’t do the time, don’t do the crime” are more true than we want to admit. What we are more comfortable with is something like “If you can’t stand the heat, take me out to dinner,” or “If you can’t do the time, have the doctor make a house call.” Everything is “I” centered. I vs You. We vs them. Good or bad and I get to decide. Black or white and the crayolas are mine. Play ball with me or I’ll shove the bat where the sun don’t shine.
December 11, 2007 at 3:29 pm
Having been raised Jewish Clyde I can tell you that Jews don’t consider Christians unclean for ANY reason. Pigs have digestive systems closer to humans than any other animal. Which is why we are able to catch the same diseases that they do and why they were not eaten back when cooking and storing systems were marginal. Almost every group eats sheep or lambs and I don’t know any group that eats camels but I suppose if anybody was hungry enough they would. This whole argument seems nonsequitor so I don’t really know what you’re getting at. Anyway we don’t live in the wild west anymore. And it seems like Republicans are usually the proponents of this sort of frontier justice. I thought we were still basically a progressive site. If this site is no longer a progressive site perhaps the critters should be notified and we can decide which of us are not comfortable with a right wing site.
December 11, 2007 at 3:29 pm
If I had my way there would be no need for laws because there would be no lawbreakers. Everybody would be respectful of everybody else and we would all live happily for a day or two until another DUHbya came along.
The stories of the New York subways and rapid transit systems throughout the US are myriad. Most of these stories revolve about the terrific crush of boarding/debarking at the stations.
In Bangkok there is a rapid transit system every bit as modern as any in our Country but a world, literally and figuratively, apart. When a train comes into a station the people wanting to board stand to one side and allow all the departees to step down and calmly walk away. Then they all board in a calm orderly fashion, moving away from the doors to let others board in comfort. However, if a criminal is caught by someone other than the police he may suffer a bit of Thai Justice similar to our “hanging tree.” Which is best? The American Justice System with the murderous crowds or the polite Thai crowds and “Frontier” Justice. Why do we have to have one or the other? Why can’t we have the best of both? Because we is people and people is dumb!
The Thais have the same concept as I wrote about.
At the end of the line of the rapid transit system in what is called the “Week-end Market”. It is basically a gigantic flea market (both literally and figuratively) as you can purchase almost anything you can dream of from a fighting rooster to chocolate covered scorpions. From a hand woven straw hat to a pair of Birkenstock sandals. All at VERY reasonable (US before Bush dollars) cost. The point: the name of the station at the end of the line is MO CHIT. And that is no shit.
December 11, 2007 at 3:41 pm
Clyde, I don’t know how many Jewish people you know but many of them eat pork. And having been born and raised in Chicago I have taken many bus and subway rides without incident. People do it every day without incident, millions of them. I believe there is more road rage incidents then there are of problems on mass transit. And in Downtown Chicago there is a farmers’s market I believe in front of the Daley Center twice a week without problem. This country has been a great place and could be just as it always was if we are allowed to flourish the way we always have if we can keep our freedoms in tact.
December 11, 2007 at 3:41 pm
Shayne,
I am sorry that I offended you. At the risk of doing it again I will point out that leaving the site or having someone kicked out because that someone doesn’t agree with you is the very bias and self-centeredness that I have been debating. “I will feel MORE comfortable if I hide my head and not admit that maybe there is a gray area somewhere. ” Don’t judge me by your standards and I won’t judge you by mine. Let’s just be polite, friendly, and enjoy the fact that we can both be here together.
Again I apologize and I meant no harm or insult to anyone. I was generalizing and we all know that any generalization is not worth a damn, including this one.
December 11, 2007 at 3:47 pm
I didn’t imply that anybody should be forced out of here. My implication is that I wouldn’t waste time working on a site that isn’t considered progressive. That would be my decision to make and I don’t believe anybody would force me to leave. But I can waste plenty of time debating at TP with conservatives.
December 11, 2007 at 3:51 pm
No one is being invited to leave the site.
Frankly Clyde, I’ve lost sight of what your argument is. It seems rather fluid at this point.
Healthy discussion = good.
Getting personal = bad.
**deep breath everyone**
December 11, 2007 at 7:39 pm
Clyde – very thought provoking post. I am downsizing, trying to rid of MORE. I collected too much MORE over the years and it was mostly nonsense MORE.
There is the Yin and Yang of everything. We give birth and we die and then it’s birth and death all over again. Who is right here? The justice system that ignored the hanging of the horse thief or the justice system that jailed the owner of the car for the death that was self-imposed by the car thief?
Not sure there is a black and white answer to this question, Clyde. What you presented is a typical values exercise. And by the responses, it is evident that you succeeded in having readers take a look at oneself.
December 11, 2007 at 8:43 pm
Thanks, Coffins.
You have it right on the nose. What I meant to do was facilitate a discussion about the payoff between personal rights and property rights and between personal rights and personal responsibility. I guess that all that came across was the “personal” part. Thanks again for the boost.