The Parent Company Trap

TDS: “Fox News is either evil or stupid for not mentioning that Alwaleed bin Talal is News Corp.’s largest shareholder.”

In last night’s episode of The Daily Show, Jon Stewart summarized all the stuff he had previously said about Fox News Channel and the misnamed Ground Zero Mosque (which is neither at Grounds Zero or, properly speaking, a mosque), and he said, “And then this morning I heard this…”

And it was former Bushie Dan Senor talking about how the funding for the mosque might come from this guy who gives money to all kinds of terrorist networks. He even tried to give $10 million to Rudy Giuliani after the 9/11 attacks. (Rudy turned it down.) And they insisted that THIS guy might be the one funding the “GZM”. Of course, the entire time they were talking about this terrorist funder, they kept not mentioning his name while showing pictures of Imam Feisal Abdul Rauf.

It turns out that the guy they were talking about, the guy who funded terrorists all over the world—is the Saudi Prince (Saudi Prince Alwaleed bin Talal) who is the largest shareholder in NewsCorp outside the Murdoch family. (Does that mean that News Corp and Fox News is owned in part by a funder of ‘terrorism’?? Does that make them a terrorist organization??? Just asking..)

Jon’s inescapable conclusion? The only way to stop funding the Ground Zero Mosque is to stop watching Fox News.

Perhaps one of the best segments ever..

Today Juan Cole posted this video as well. He wrote:

Apparently most of the country actually prefers Democrats to Republicans, thinks well of Obama’s major initiatives, and just wants the jobs to come back. All this noise about tea parties and vilifying Muslim Americans is being generated by just three guys– the Koch brothers and Rupert Murdoch. And poor Prince Alwaleed’s capital is being used for Islamophobia. For a Saudi prince to help fund Fox Cable News is like having a prominent African American entrepreneur fund a Steppin Fetchit remake. If I were he, I’d sell my shares in Fox, or maybe sue Newscorp for libel. I know suing yourself for libel could be complicated, but surely there is a tax break in there somewhere.

Jon Stewart & Anderson Cooper Look at Gaping Holes – Security

“Terror Babies” – What an insanely ridiculous claim.. (If you missed this entire interview with Anderson Cooper trying to pin down Rep. Louie Gohmert, giving him opportunity to give proof of his insane claims, watch it here in its entirety. Kudos to Anderson Cooper for keeping a straight face as he continues to press Rep. Gohmert with valid questions while this crazy lawmaker goes off on his crazy, continuous, loud rant.)

Rep. Louie Gohmert.. Oh dear lord.. (banging my head on my desk..)
This guy is more like Gomer Pyle, just not nearly as smart (my apologies to Gomer Pyle). I just can’t believe this person is a member of the U.S. Congress. My favorite part of this segment is when Jon trumps the “Terror Babies” claim with the U.S. having HERO Babies! No problem!

At the end of one of the Gohmert clips the Representative says (this while comparing Hitler and his followers to President Obama and those who voted for him):

“We do have useful idiots today who are heard to say “Wow, what we really need is for the president to be a dictator for a little while..”

Rep. Gohmert should be more concerned with the gaping hole between his ears..

For comparison sake, here is a short clip of Gomer Pyle – “Well, gaw-w-w-lly!”

Colbert: Fox News Can’t Tell Black People Apart

From TPM:

Stephen Colbert said last night that he thinks it was an “innocent mistake” that Greta Van Susteren used footage of Shirley Sherrod instead of Maxine Waters the other day on her Fox News show. “It could have happened to anyone…whose producers can’t tell black people apart.”

Colbert also pointed out that though Fox News has the highest ratings in cable news, only 1.38% of their viewers are black. He had his people break down who those viewers are, and found that “45% are trapped in the waiting room of a Jiffy Lube, 7% are white people who just enjoy watching Fox News in blackface, 25% said Glenn Beck’s name three times in the mirror and his show appeared, and the remaining 23% is Juan Williams.”

THIS was funny..

Jon Stewart: “I Give Up”

The Daily Show:

Despite Anthony Weiner’s passion and a clear majority, the House defeats a bill providing health care for 9/11 first responders..

I still can’t believe just how broken our system is.. Aside note.. Rep. Anthony Weiner is one of my heroes.

McChrystal’s Balls – Honorable Discharge

The media questions Rolling Stone’s access to Stanley McChrystal, and Gretchen Carlson knows what it’s like to have Obama’s tough job.  She makes “executive decisions” on a daily basis.   Fortunately for us, her decisions have no impact on governing our nation.

Stupid in Short Supply

Wholesalers across the nation are reporting shortages in Stupid. With the demand for Stupid running at an all-time high, retailers can’t keep enough Stupid on hand.

“It’s flying off the shelves” said a spokesperson for retailing giant WalMart. “Especially in rural areas. People  just can’t seem to get enough Stupid.”

Rumor has it that media mogul Rupert Murdoch invested heavily in Stupid through the entire Bush Administration, severely draining the nation’s stockpiles. Then, just as supplies of Stupid were nearing historic lows McCain nominated Sarah Palin.

“That nearly did us in.” commented the spokesperson. “Our suppliers couldn’t keep up with demand. We were shipping in Stupid from Alaska faster than it could be produced.”

Fortunately, Arizona has come to the plate and increased its manufacuring of Stupid. But the price of Stupid remains high.

“So high” said the WalMart press contact, “that we’re seeing an increasing demand for Ignorance. It used to be Ignorance was priced out of the market for most families on a budget, but with the price of Stupid going through the roof, stocking up on Ignorance is a no-brainer.”

Market analysts are pinning the cause on Fox News, which goes through an incredible amount of Stupid each 24-hour news cycle. But other mainstream media outlets are reportedly using more than their share of Stupid as well.

With the Gulf Oil Crisis beginning its third month, retailers in the deep south are reporting they have totally run out of Stupid.

“We’re down to just plain Dumb, now.” said one unnamed merchant who’s store overlooks a tar-stained beach on the Gulf Coast.

: : : : : : : : : :

Fracking…

Ever heard of “Fracking”..? I hadn’t before yesterday.

In this video from The Daily Show, “Gasland” director Josh Fox talks with Jon Stewart about the toxic materials from hydraulic fracturing that are turning up in people’s water supplies.

The process is called hydraulic fracturing, or “Fracking”.

It is a process of pumping more than a million gallons of water along with a mix of sand and fluids [pdf] deep into the Earth to break apart the rock below and free the gas locked inside it.

It’s a technique that’s been used for decades to extract oil and natural gas from shale, but it has seen a growth spurt in recent years, thanks to technological advances, like hydrofracking, that have made it more competitive economically.

This article from “Speakeasy” (WSJ) goes into more detail on this new documentary “Gasland”:

: : : : : : : : : :

South Carolina’s 4th District Primary – Bob Inglis

The Colbert Report: “Bob Inglis should quit Congress and get a job at Olive Garden to convince the people of South Carolina he’s not an incumbent.”

This was pretty funny.. Colbert does his leading questions where Inglis is supposed to finish that sentence..

Colbert says: “Complete this sentence. Barack Obama was born in…”

Inglis replies: “Not Hawaii.”

Hmmmm… I can’t believe Inglis would have answered that way, even if he was joking..

Day 59 – Judgment Day – The Strife Aquatic

TDS: “Several big oil companies include a dead emergency contact in their contingency plans, and Joe Barton apologizes to BP for having to pay $20 billion.”

An Energy-Independent Future

TDS: “The last eight presidents have gone on television and promised to move America towards an energy-independent future.”

Jon Stewart takes a look back…

Stephen Colbert And James Carville On Gulf Oil Spill

I know that I’ve already posted several videos today, but just had to add one more. Stephen Colbert had on James Carville, “the ragin’ Cajun” who lives in Louisiana, last night to talk about the oil leak.

Jon Stewart Takes On Helen Thomas

Jon Stewart takes on Helen Thomas, and then in order to make himself feel better, takes on South Carolina..

Colbert Kicks Tony Hayward’s Ass

Stephen Colbert decides to show President Obama how to get really angry, and so he rolls up his sleeves – no, scratch that.. – rips off his sleeves, and then goes out and kicks BP CEO Tony Hayward’s ass..

Clusterf#&k to the War House – Korean Peninsula & Middle East

TDS: North Korea sinks a South Korean battleship, and Israeli commandos raid a flotilla of ships in international waters.

Once again Jon Stewart manages to inject a dose of common sense to a major world incident or event. No matter how complex.

And Charles Krauthammer, you suck.

CHARLES KRAUTHAMMER: The fundamental deception here is the use of the word “humanitarian.” As we saw, humanitarians don’t wield iron clubs and would have killed the Israelis had the Israelis not drawn their pistols in self-defense. But there’s a larger issue here. What exactly is the humanitarian crisis that the flotilla was actually addressing? There is none. There’s no one starving in Gaza. [..]

There’s a very interesting post at Crooks and Liars by “Heather”. Watch the video of a debate between Eliot Spitzer and Glenn Greenwald. Greenwald brings some reason and balance to the discussion.

Flotilla Debate: Glenn Greenwald vs Eliot Spitzer

Here’s the post put up by Glenn Greenwald following this discussion with Spitzer. He has a lot of interesting links.

Breaking News: BP Purchases Gulf of Mexico

Roiters International: Florida

Invoking the widely used rule of Commerce “You broke it, you bought it” British Petroleum announced earlier today it has purchased the Gulf of Mexico. Although the rule is most frequently enforced in fine china and crystal shops, lawyers for BP said it does have application elsewhere and could find nothing to prohibit its application here.

The deal for an undisclosed amount was closed with one Felipe Aguadel DeLeon, the last known surviving heir of the renowned explorer Ponce DeLeon who dedicated his life searching for a Fountain of Youth reported to be somewhere in Florida.

According to centuries old documents, DeLeon was convinced that the Fountain’s waters flowed into the Gulf. While land grants from the Spanish Crown were common at that time, DeLeon asked for, and received, a grant for the entire Gulf of Mexico. Later, when Spain ceded Florida to the United States, nothing in the transaction included the Gulf, which remained in the sole possession of the DeLeon estate.

Constitutional Law professor Joe Furley explained, “This is totally out of the realm of anything the Constitution was designed to deal with. It was always presumed that the waters of the sea, beyond the range of a fortress’ guns, belonged to no one. ”  The Grant appears to be authentic, he added, which means the transaction will stand up in U.S. Courts.

UPDATE: A convoy of trucks loaded with No Trespassing, No Fishing, No Swimming signs has been spotted heading towards the Gulf Coast.

: : : : : : : : : :

Texas Board of Education Adopts New Math Curriculum

Back in Black – Glenn Beck’s Nazi Tourette’s

One of the B-E-S-T videos I’ve seen in a LONG, long, long, LONG TIME!

Bernie Goldberg Fires Back..

From The Daily Show:

Jon apologizes for criticizing Bernie Goldberg and Fox News, but it’s only because they’re a terrible, cynical, disingenuous news organization.

I guess I missed the start of this ‘tiff’ between Bernie Goldberg from Fox Noise and Jon Stewart when Stewart told Bernie to “go f*@k yourself” in a segment last week. This response from Stewart to Goldberg’s latest criticism still has me laughing!!

Goldberg.. What a flipping blowhard. He faces the camera and addresses Stewart directly, starting out with a guilty plea to Jon Stewart’s charge that Goldberg generalizes when he talks about “liberals”, and then he tries telling Jon Stewart that if he (Jon) wants to be a good social commentator, he needs to find some guts..

Stewart asks how hard can it be for Goldberg to sit on Bill O’Reilly’s show and criticize ‘liberal elites’.. He reminds Goldberg that he is a comedian doing political satire, and that he “hasn’t moved out of the comedian’s box into the news box”, “the news box is moving towards me” ( Jon Stewart).

Goldberg goes downhill from there by accusing Stewart of being ‘a SAFE Jay Leno with a smaller audience who gets to use the “F bomb”‘ and then calls his (Stewart’s) audience “incredibly unsophisticated”. Stewart’s response is priceless.

Stewart goes on to school Goldberg on what satire is and isn’t, he then goes after Goldberg for not following his own tagline (Fox Noise’s so-called ‘fair and balanced’).

Stewart ends with calling Fox Noise “the Lupus of news”, and then addressing Goldberg and FOX directly, with the choir behind him singing backup, he says “As long as fair and balanced is how you sell yourselves..” (then) “GO F*@K YOURSELVES!”

A Farewell to Arms

Fox News wants you to decide if the Nuclear Security Summit logo looks similar to the flags representing Muslim nations..

OH!! Suh–MACK!!! Take that Fox Noise…

Health Care Reform Passes! Both Houses of Congress Override Veto!

Dateline: March 20, 2011.

Acting swiftly on their promise to undo ObamaCare last year, the Republican super majority in both Houses of Congress voted to override President Obama’s veto of their HealthCare Reform.

Health insurance company stocks rebounded overnight, with many companies doubling in value at the close of trading today. The Frisk/Boehner Health Care Reform Act removed all Federal Regulation of not only health insurance, but the entire health care provider industry. Using the Supremacy Clause of the Constitution, Frisk/Boehner also prevents States from regulating health care or health care insurance.

Tort Reform, a central piece of the Republican legislation, is now the law of the land nationwide. Literally hundreds of medical malpractice lawsuits were stopped dead in their tracks as doctors, hospitals, pharmaceutical companies and health insurance companies were granted blanket immunity from such suits, effective immediately.

Colbert carves himself up a little Karl Rove..

From Raw Replay:

Stephen Colbert review Karl Rove’s new “who-didn’t-dun-it” autobiography Thursday.

Colbert uses satire: ‘Sarah Palin is a f**king retard’

Awesome…

From Raw Story:

Stephen Colbert explains that it’s okay to call Sarah Palin a “fucking retard” because it’s satire.

The Colbert Report: The Word: Prece-Don’t

“John Roberts has a brilliant legal strategy to get around following precedent: not following precedent.”

TDS: Thank You, South Carolina

Jon Stewart takes a whack at addressing Lieutenant Governor Andre Bauer who compares kids who get free lunches in public schools to stray animals..

Andre Bauer (in a clip):

“My grandmother was not a highly educated woman but she told me as a small child to quit feeding stray animals. You know why? Because they breed! You’re facilitating the problem if you give an animal or a person ample food supply. They will reproduce. Especially ones that don’t think too much further than that.”

And then Bauer says:

“You show me the school that has the highest free and reduced lunch and I’ll show you the worst test scores folks. It’s there.”

To this Jon Stewart replies:

“Oh that’s logical. I can see the correlation. Look at all those fat people walking out of Weight Watchers. What are they feeding them in there!?”

Stewart is so right in this clip.. I now better understand why Governor Mark Sanford didn’t have to resign following his ridiculous sexcapades. The replacement for the governor “is a nightmare.”

Onward Christian Soldiers

I still can’t believe this story.. Stephen Colbert nails it.
Colbert:

“Technically Jesus rifles aren’t a holy war — they’re more like an armor-piercing Sunday school.”

Here’s the segment from The Rachel Maddow Show when Rachel reported on the Military Rifle Scopes for Jesus!: