American History, as told by Sarah Palin.

By now you’ve probably heard of Palin’s recounting of the Midnight Ride of Paul Revere:

He who warned, uh, the British that they weren’t going to be taking away our arms uh by ringing those bells and making sure as he’s riding his horse through town to send those warning shots and bells that we were going to be secure and we were going to be free and we were going to be armed.

The Zoo recently came into possession of documents which some scholars feel may be Palin’s actual notes she wrote while studying American History in College. We share those with you, our dear readers, so that you might have a better understanding of our history and culture, through the eyes of our next President of the United States of America:

The Pilgrims came to America in 1492 wearin their funny hats and shoes and buckles because they wanted religious freedom so they escaped from Nazi Germany because Hitler was sending all the Jews to Israel and they didn’t want to go to Israel because there was no oil there. So they drove their Plymoth over the rocks to Manhatten where they met a bunch of Indians. The Indians said they owned Manhatten, but they didn’t have any birth certificates, so the Pilgrims, naturally knowing the Indians were here illegally, but being good Christians and good neighbors and all gave the Indians a gift certificate to buy them some jewelery at Tiffanies and the Indians gave Manhatten to the Pilgrims so they could practice their religious freedoms and burn the witches that picked all their May flowers.

Our Founding Fathers fought the American Revolution and fired that shot heard around the world because they warned the British not to dump all their tea into the harbor and destroy our freedoms and of religion, too, and they had the right to bear arms. and free markets.

The Civil war was fought by our founding fathers after that greatest of all Republican Presidents Ronald Reagan freed the slaves. The southern states weren’t very civil about it and so they called it the Civil War but the southern states wanted socialism and so that’s why they lost. But once the slaves were free they shot Abraham Lincoln because they didn’t want all that personal responsibility and accountability and so that’s why Democrats gave them welfare so they wouldn’t have to work anymore after their slavery was taken away from them.

Enough: It’s time to take a stand — against the likes of Sarah Palin

Source: Paul Jamiol

On Saturday, a man named Jared Lee Loughner murdered six people, and wounded thirteen others, including Rep Gabrielle Giffords of Arizona, who is in critical condition (as of this writing) with a bullet to her brain.

These are the dead:

  • Phyllis Scheck, 79
  • Dorthy Murray, 76
  • Dorwin Stoddard, 76
  • John M. Roll, 63
  • Gabriel Zimmerman, 30
  • Christina Green, 9

Tell me something Sarah Palin, Sharron Angle, Rush Limbaugh, Glenn Beck, Bill O’Reilly, and Fox News et al: When is enough enough? When do you feel like you’ve “won?”  How much blood must be shed, in the name of your twisted ideology?  What is it going to take for you to SHUT UP?

Who will be the next Scott Roeder…Richard Popalowski…Jim Adkisson…Byron Williams…or Jared Lee Loughner?  Who will be the next unbalanced crackpot, sitting next to his/her radio or television, soaking up the despicable noxious bloviations gushing from your loathsome mouths, and deciding that the best thing to do about your egregious hyperbole is to take a gun and blast people out of existence?  Who!?

Don’t worry, no one expects any tearful retractions — as if such a thing is even possible — or heartfelt mea culpas.  No no no no, we all know that there was no way you could have anticipated the effect your vomitous spewing would have on the odd unbalanced individual. Heavens no!  Hearing Bill O’Reilly’s pompous pontificating over “Tiller the baby killer” or Glenn Beck’s paranoid ravings about the Tides Foundation or Sarah Palin’s thoughtless and provocative hit list with gun cross-hairs couldn’t possibly have any adverse effect, right?

Well, Sarah Palin is right about one thing.  It IS time to take a stand — against the likes of her, O’Reilly, Beck, Limbaugh, and so many others whose main purpose in life is to foment hatred and violence, while making tons of money in the process of shredding the fabric of this country.

This stops now — a little girl named Christina Green will never see her 10th birthday, because of YOU.

This is our daily open thread.

Sarah Palin – Killing by Proxy

 

Sarah Palin's Bullseye Map

So she really thought there weren’t some idiots out there who would put a bullett where she indicated it should go? So she really thought words have no consequences? Advocating political assassination was a hallmark of the German right between the World Wars. It was a hallmark of NAZISM! Sarah Palin is an accomplice to six counts of murder and 12 counts of shooting with the intent to kill. Period.

 

UPDATE: BREAKING NEWS:

Sadly we can add 5 more to the total, and one wounded Democratic member of the House of Representatives:

Arizona Rep. Giffords shot, at least 5 killed

By TERRY TANG, AMANDA LEE MYERS and DAVID ESPO, Associated Press Terry Tang, Amanda Lee Myers And David Espo, Associated Press – 47 mins ago
TUCSON, Ariz. – Rep. Gabrielle Giffords of Arizona was shot in the head Saturday when an assailant opened fire outside a grocery store during a meeting with constituents, killing at least five people and wounding several others in a rampage that rattled the nation.