Georgie (A Rock Opera Parody)

I originally published this back on 7/20/07, but I wanted to post it again as a final goodbye to George W. Bush. Here is the post as it appears on my blog. I hope you enjoy it one more time. Sorry there are no videos for this. May I suggest you put the CD in your computer and follow it along that way. :)
A friend of mine said to me one day, “You know what you should do? You should try to do a whole rock opera, like ‘Tommy’ or something.” “Yeah, right, I doubt I could do a whole album.” As it happened, some time later some ideas came to me that seem to fit “Tommy” the best. To the extent that it came out at all good, we can thank my friend “Tony” (not his real name). And if it doesn’t measure up, the fault lies entirely with me, and not at all with my wife, Jane, who, as she so often does and does well, gave me some tips, advice and corrections along the way. Thank you, Honey. “Tommy”, the Opera, was written by Pete Townshend except for: “Eyesight To The Blind (The Hawker)”, by Sonny Boy Williamson; “Cousin Kevin” and “Fiddle About”, by John Entwistle; and “Tommy’s Holiday Camp”, by Keith Moon. I hope you enjoy it. Feel free to send your friends a link to this blog. Thank you.
No permission was granted by any of the authors for the original songs parodied, nor did I think it possible to even get it. Those authors retain full rights to their work (mostly Pete Townshend). All new lyrics here are copyright 2007, Wayne A. Schneider.
I also have a confession to make. I skipped one of the songs. It is, arguably, the worst song on the album, and I was going nuts trying to write something to it, especially since I didn’t want to have to listen to it while writing. I usually skip that track on the CD, anyway, as I’m sure many of you do. It bogs down the whole thing. That song is, of course, “Welcome.” (“Come to my house, be one of the comfortable people…”) But don’t worry, I picked it right back up from there with the rest of the album. And if I have in any way ruined “Tommy” for any of you by writing and posting this, I do sincerely apologize, and I ask forgiveness. I was only doing it to entertain. Thank you once again.
And we don’t have to take it, either. Write to your Representatives and Senators and demand that President George W. Bush be impeached and removed from office immediately. There is too much time between now and Jan ’09 for him to cause more death, destruction, and devastation, and to start another war with Iran. Remember that the AUMF that allowed him to launch the first attack against Afghanistan said he could attack anyone related to the people responsible for the 9/11 attacks. Lately, he’s been talking about al Qaeda in Iraq as being “the same people who attacked us on Sept 11th.” They are NOT! The group in Iraq claiming allegiance to al Qaeda didn’t form until 2004. Bush is trying to say that Iran is helping these people. By extension, since Iran is aiding “those who attacked us” before, he will claim he already has the authority to attack Iran. And he will not tell the Congress or the U.N. about it first. Remove him from office at once, before it’s too late.
NOTE: Frankly I’m surprised he didn’t do it, but then, he does have three more days, so who knows? And Israel is chomping at the bit to attack Iran because, some day, they might be able to harm Israel. But that’s a subject for another post. Enjoy.

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40 top failures of the Bush administration

We to the left of center, know that the George W. Bush presidency has been an abject failure.  Actually, not just an abject failure, which implies that George is just a harmless fuck-up, but a failure that carries a death toll.

The Paper Trail Blog has summarized Broken Goverment’s list of 128 Bush administration failures since the year 2000.

If you think the Bush “reign of error” was disgusting you already, this list will really make you sick.

45 million Americans without health care
60 percent of EPA scientists report political interference with their work
1,273 whistleblower complaints filed from 2002-2008; 1,256 were dismissed
190,000 U.S.-supplied weapons missing in Iraq
$212.3 million in overcharges by Halliburton for Iraq oil reconstruction work
$455 billion deficit for fiscal year 2008; estimated to reach up to $1 trillion in 2009
$9.91 billion for government secrecy in 2007 — a record
809 government laptops with sensitive information lost by FBI, Drug Enforcement Administration, and Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco, Firearms and Explosives
30 million pounds of beef recalled in 2007
$300 billion over budget for Department of Defense weapons acquisitions
Less than 3 percent of U.S. electricity needs met by alternative energy
2,145 troops killed and 21,000 injured in Iraq from March 2003 through November 1, 2008, by IEDs (improvised explosive devices) and other explosives — many while awaiting body armor. Additionally, tens of thousands of Iraqis have been killed in the conflict
34.8 percent of oil used in America imported during Nixon administration; 42.2 percent during first Gulf War; 59.9 percent in 2006
$100 million for failed FBI computer network
$100 billion in federal tax revenues lost annually to corporations using off-shore tax shelters
163 million airline passengers delayed 320 million hours; cost to U.S. economy: more than $41 billion in 2007
$60 billion stolen in Medicare fraud each year
2.5 million toxic toys recalled in summer of 2007
$12.5 billion for defective National Polar-Orbiting Environmental Satellite System
$4 billion to upgrade National Security Agency computers that often crash, have trouble talking to each other, and lose key intelligence
60,000 flights made by 46 Southwest Airline jets in violation of FAA safety directives due to lax FAA enforcement
12.8 percent job turnover at Department of Homeland Security in 2006 — double that of any other cabinet-level agency

If you’re up to the task of reading the rest of the list, go here.

Excuse me, I need to go lie down…

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I’m really gonna miss systematically destroying this place…

The Onion

Oh, America. Eight years went by so fast, didn’t they? I feel like I hardly got to know you and methodically undermine everything you once stood for. But I guess all good things must come to an end, and even though you know I would love to stick around for another year or four—maybe privatize Social Security or get us into Iran—I’m afraid it’s time to go. But before I leave, let me say, from the bottom of my heart: I can’t think of another country I would’ve rather led to the brink of collapse.

Boy, oh boy, if these Oval Office walls could talk. Seems like it was only yesterday that I started my first term despite having actually lost to Al Gore by more than a half million votes. Hmm. We were all so young and peaceful then. Gosh, gas was still under $2 a gallon! On my watch it peaked at more than twice that. Never getting it up to $6 or ideally $7.50 will be one of my few regrets when I leave office.

It’s just gonna be so hard packing up my things and heading off into the sunset come January. I wish I could go on forever giving massive and disastrous tax cuts to the wealthy, taking the country from a surplus to a deficit—nearly $500 billion this year, likely to pass $1 trillion next year, fingers crossed—and just generally doing irreparable damage to the very underpinnings of our economy, but, well, I’m afraid the Constitution says I can’t. And not even I can overrule the Constitution. Though Lord knows I tried! Initiating blanket wiretaps without warrants, suspending habeas corpus for prisoners in Guantanamo, infiltrating an unknown number of nonviolent civilian antiwar groups without permission… such wonderful memories. I’m going to cherish them forever.

My fellow Americans, I only hope that every time you have your civil liberties encroached upon by the Patriot Act, you’ll think of me.

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