By Briseadh na Faire
If only…we cut taxes, then I could keep more of my money.
If only…we eliminate Social Security, then I could choose how to invest for my retirement.
If only…we eliminate all social welfare programs, then I’ll never have to depend on big government to survive.
If only…we put up a big wall between the U.S. and Mexico, with armed guards and predator drones, then people won’t cross the border illegally and take our jobs.
If only…we keep gays from getting married, then they won’t be able to destroy heterosexual marriages.
If only…we prevent all abortions, then we will truly uphold the sanctity of life.
If only…we were all true followers of Christ, i.e. fundamental evangelical Christians, then everyone would submit to His Will.
If only…we stopped taxing Corporations, then they would create more jobs.
If only…we stopped regulating Corporations, then their goods and services would be cheaper.
If only…we eliminated the minimum wage, then Corporations could hire more people.
If only…we eliminated child labor laws, then our kids could help out by earning their own keep.
If only…we eliminated environmental protections, then Corporations could pass those savings onto the consumers.
If only…we eliminated the Estate tax, then when we get rich, we can pass that onto our children and grandchildren.
If only…we invaded Iran, then we would have peace in the Middle East.
If only…we invaded North Korea, then we would have world peace.
If only…we allowed the government to spy on everyone, then we will eliminate terrorism.
If only…we changed the Constitution to prevent citizenship to anyone born here of an illegal alien, we would stop illegal immigration.
If only…we allowed enhanced interrogation techniques to be used on all criminal suspects, then no one would get off on a technicality and we’d all be safer.
If only…everybody could carry a concealed weapon everywhere, we’d all be safer.
If only…we eliminated unemployment benefits, then everyone would get to work.
This is our daily open thread. Y’all know what to do.