The Watering Hole: Wednesday, February 29, 2012: Captain Kirk to vie for RNC nomination!

William Shatner, best known for his role as Captain Kirk of the United Federation of Planets Starship Enterprise, issued a press release this leap day announcing his intent to seek the Republican Nomination for President, in the event none of the current candidates go into the RNC Convention with the nomination locked up.

“I look at it this way,” Shatner said in a recent interview,

Nobody in the current Republican field has more foreign policy experience than I do. I was battling Klingons and Romulans while Santorum was still in grade school. And Romney may be a captain of industry, but I was Captain of a Starship. Romney led Bain Capital that bought up companies and bankrupted them. I helped take a defunct science fiction TV series to a successful franchise that had multiple successful spin-offs and created numerous jobs.

I will lead the Republican Party, and this Country into the future. The Republican Party ended slavery. I had the first inter-racial kiss on TV.

I have dealt with illegal aliens on a galactic scale, and I always win.

When it comes to the economy, who…has a better reputation than…me … “THE … NEGOTIATOR” for the best rates for flights and lodging…anywhere!

And … like that Great Republican, Ronald Reagan, I … too … am a movie star. But where Reagan co-starred with a monkey, I … co-starred with a Vulcan. That’s gotta count…for….something.

Shatner’s announcement, coming on the heels of Super Tuesday, caught the Republican establishment totally off-guard. When asked for comment, Santorum said, “Captain Who?” Romney said “I’m good friends with the producers of Star Trek.” Ron Paul said, “Why do we need a Federation of Planets, anyway?” And Newt Gingrich said “Shatner’s a bad actor from a bad TV series that would lead our country in the wrong direction. I’m the only candidate who has promised to build a base on the Moon, because I know that obelisque is up there in the Tycho Crater.”

Sarah Palin issued a press release of her own stating, “Bill Shatner’s no big deal. I can see space from my front porch in Alaska!”

THIS IS OUR OPEN THREAD. ENJOY “LEAP DAY”. WOMEN, THIS IS YOUR CHANCE: GO OUT AND PROPOSE TO SOMEONE TONIGHT!