The Watering Hole: Wednesday, February 29, 2012: Captain Kirk to vie for RNC nomination!

William Shatner, best known for his role as Captain Kirk of the United Federation of Planets Starship Enterprise, issued a press release this leap day announcing his intent to seek the Republican Nomination for President, in the event none of the current candidates go into the RNC Convention with the nomination locked up.

“I look at it this way,” Shatner said in a recent interview,

Nobody in the current Republican field has more foreign policy experience than I do. I was battling Klingons and Romulans while Santorum was still in grade school. And Romney may be a captain of industry, but I was Captain of a Starship. Romney led Bain Capital that bought up companies and bankrupted them. I helped take a defunct science fiction TV series to a successful franchise that had multiple successful spin-offs and created numerous jobs.

I will lead the Republican Party, and this Country into the future. The Republican Party ended slavery. I had the first inter-racial kiss on TV.

I have dealt with illegal aliens on a galactic scale, and I always win.

When it comes to the economy, who…has a better reputation than…me … “THE … NEGOTIATOR” for the best rates for flights and lodging…anywhere!

And … like that Great Republican, Ronald Reagan, I … too … am a movie star. But where Reagan co-starred with a monkey, I … co-starred with a Vulcan. That’s gotta count…for….something.

Shatner’s announcement, coming on the heels of Super Tuesday, caught the Republican establishment totally off-guard. When asked for comment, Santorum said, “Captain Who?” Romney said “I’m good friends with the producers of Star Trek.” Ron Paul said, “Why do we need a Federation of Planets, anyway?” And Newt Gingrich said “Shatner’s a bad actor from a bad TV series that would lead our country in the wrong direction. I’m the only candidate who has promised to build a base on the Moon, because I know that obelisque is up there in the Tycho Crater.”

Sarah Palin issued a press release of her own stating, “Bill Shatner’s no big deal. I can see space from my front porch in Alaska!”


132 thoughts on “The Watering Hole: Wednesday, February 29, 2012: Captain Kirk to vie for RNC nomination!

  1. So far, these primary contests have allowed Romney to concentrate on saturating one state with negative ads against the leading Not-Romney.
    In the only day of multiple contests, he looked bad. (Feb.7)
    He’s got one week to scratch out Gingrich in Georgia, and Santorum in eight other states. I don’t think he can do it. Santorum may win five states next Tuesday. Romney will take Massachsetts, Vermont, Idaho (large Mormon population) and Virginia (only has to beat Ron Paul). If he adds one more, he’s accomplished something. He burned through a lot of money just to win in Maine and Michigan. Maine became a must win because of Feb. 7, and Michigan because he supposedly had a home state advantage.

  2. Too many questions.
    Who would his appointees be?
    What about the wrath of Khan?
    Does this mean the House and the Senate will have to wear those uniforms?

  3. Putting the toothpaste back in the tube:

    The Rev. Franklin Graham on Tuesday apologized for publicly raising questions about President Barack Obama’s Christian faith, saying “I regret any comments I have ever made which may have cast any doubt on the personal faith of our president, Mr. Obama.”

    May have. Screw you, Frankie.

    • Jesus may give you a mulligan in your mind fundy but not in the real world.

      “C**k punch for a Mr Graham! I have here a c***punch here for a Mr Graham?”

  4. Food stamp ‘reform’

    I didn’t know Steve Benen was writing for Maddow Blog! Anyhoo, he’s linked to a post on the Daily Caller (not linking to it) in which an asshole named McClanahan has a ‘great’ idea for people who have to accept government assistance in order to eat, namely humiliation and shame.

    There should be humiliation and pain in government assistance. Every time someone accepts food stamps, they are spitting on the principles of independence, and they, not the taxpayers who fund the program, should be reminded of that fact.

    • Aside from everything that is wrong with this, the a’holes forget that food stamps are not a USDA program for nothing. It’s also a welfare program for big Ag and their subsidiaries and distributors, to insure a market for their products even in tough economic times. So, how many CEOs and farmers do the assholes think should be humiliated?

  5. TROY, Ohio — An adoptive father in western Ohio has been accused of raping three children and allowing other men to have sex with one of them.

    A family services official Wednesday called the allegations “heinous, horrific, awful,” as state and local authorities investigated. The children had been adopted through a private agency.

    Thirty-nine-year-old Kenneth Brandt was jailed Feb. 24. He’s being held on $800,000 bond in Miami County Jail on three counts of rape and one of compelling prostitution.

    — But by all means, prohibit gays from adopting.

  6. From C&L:

    From Tuesday night’s The Daily Show, regular Samantha Bee laid waste to Americans for Tax Reform’s Grover Norquist while interviewing him about his so-called “Taxpayer Protection Pledge.”

    NORQUIST: My team is winning and it can be taught to Harry Reid. He wanted a $2.5 trillion tax increase last year and he didn’t get it.

    BEE: Your team is winning? It’s like you came up with this whole idea when you were twelve.

    NORQUIST: It was something I came up with when I was twelve, to get a teacher to…

    BEE: I’m sorry, what did you say? You came up with this idea when you were…

    NORQUIST: Seventh grade.

    BEE: …in seventh grade?

    BEE (off camera): Yes, the entire federal government is paralyzed because of a document, written by a twelve year old, in 1968.

    Bee’s solution for the Democrats… get their own “think tank” of twelve year olds.

    • The RW’s idea of diplomacy has for years been, “Do as I say or else,” and that if you don’t take a strong, aggressive, threatening posture in dealing with anyone, you are weak and ill-suited to be conducting diplomacy. I don’t think the RW understands the meaning of the word “diplomacy.” They certainly don’t understand its purpose.

  7. QOTD:

    “Time was when Catholics (who, you know, *invented* the university) worked and saved and struggled so that their kids could get through college. Now you have guys like Santorum talking like dimestore Protestant preachers denouncing them fancy pants college boys with their degrees and championing the glories of Know Nothingism as a moral virtue,” – Arch-Catholic Mark Shea.

    • Sanscrotum forgets HE is one of the fancy pants college boys….3 different universities, and a law degree…

      Another interesting aspect of this primary season….the radical neoconservative rightwing fringe have said nothing about either of the two forerunners’ religion. To come down to the wire with a Catholic and a Mormon ???? Neither candidate a “TRUE” protestant Christian?

      • Sanitorium is just throwing raw meat to the people who never went to college and resent the “elites” who did. “I’m just as good as those guys!”

        And even weirder is that there are *two* Catholics in the mix, if we assume Gingrich is anything more than a thorn.

        • I have to read the comments as I can’t stream video. I found this, written by CAL:
          “Nothing new here, but Rios again perfectly displays The Right’s most pathetic scam. If you listen to the clip, arrogance and hostility literally ooze off of Rios. These things are in no way Christian. The Right has hi-jacked “Christianity”, hides behind it, and has mangled it to conform to their warped agenda. Rios has no more understanding of the concept of God than anyone else, including the atheist on the other side of the screen.
          It’s very simple. The Right is incapable of dealing in reality or facts. If they hi-jack the idea of Christian God as being on their side, they don’t have to deal in facts or face reality. The Left doesn’t “hate God.” The Left hates God being used as a political sledgehammer to enable the Right to impose public policy that is un-Christian in every way. ”

          That sums it up for me pretty neatly. I believe it’s a sin to cause others to hate you, as well as to hate others. She’s twice guilty.

      • Glad you were “in the wrong” blog and gave us that link. I enjoyed reading Doyle!
        An apropos title “The Jesus-Eating Cult of Rick Santorum”!

        • hmm, that’s a dilemma.
          This commenter has it all figured out///

          nonlib106p · 5 hours ago

          This just proves how Junk science has run a muck. That Spotted Owl sham was nothing more then to shut down Logging in Places like Grisdale and Govey. And destroy that Industry. And now when the truth comes out the left comes up with this cockamamie hair brained Idea. I say let the Bard Owl be and let Nature take its course and when the Spotted owl is Gone let us return to logging the National forests and the old growth trees.

        • So, let me get this straight. Spotted Owl good, Barred Owl bad. Bird species do expand or shift their territories just as a natural process. It’s not like a bunch of people had Barred Owls as pets and then let them go (e.g. starlings, parakeets). It sounds a little like they want to increase the Spotted Owl population simply to protect the forest from logging; if the Spotted Owl disappears entirely, then there is no protected species to, er, protect. The Barred Owls aren’t the avian kudzu are they?

          I just like owls and think the notion of shooting them is barbaric. ’cause they’re owls, damnit.

          • And the comments blame this all on Obama — more evidence of how corrupt and stupid his administration is. By jingo, if this was Bush it would be on the cover of every newspaper and magazine in the country for weeks. Forget the owls. Just shoot me.

          • I’ve been hearing about this for a few years now. Knowing the pace at which the gov’t moves, this idea has been around well before Obama took office. It’s just now at the “public comment” stage. The meat of this new policy is increased logging in the National Forests in the Pacific Northwest, a significant concession to industry and jobs, and it is an election year. Shooting barred owls is the decoy, to get the enviros all worked up, drawing attention away from the timbering issue.
            I cry fowl.

    • That was really fascinating. As someone that has been trained in science, I am looking forward to learning more about the “Ice Man”. I find genetics very fascinating and I love biological science. Physics is above my head.

      • This gives us a point in the development of lactose intolerance. If Ötzi carries a full set of regional genes and lactose intolerance would be an indicator for that factor could mark a check point that could place .horticulture in its proper place in human development. Genetic markers are already available for individuals who lived in the Nordic and Germanic areas. The same exist for the Mediterranean region.

        Since Ötzi has a complete genome (brain, nerves, organs, skeletal and muscular), much can be derived from his discovery in relation to human development from his time to this time! Mitochondrial DNA, which is extremely exact, could link him to Middle Eastern cultures.


    “This is the work of my life, it is thus that I dreamed of Hell. If my visions are true, then the wicked may rest assured, the afterlife will be sweet for them to bear.”

  9. Speaking of 3D….

    Sometime in the future, dying will be an option:

    “Some researchers are excited by the potential organ-building capabilities of three-dimensional (3-D) printers. These devices are modified versions of everyday inkjet printers that squirt living cells rather than drops of ink. Layer by layer, they can make three-dimensional structures such as organs and, as of September last year, the blood vessels they contain. [Anthony] Atala is developing this technique – he wowed the audience at a TED conference last year by printing a kidney on stage (although not a functional one). He says, “For the level four organs [heart, lungs, etc.], it’s just a matter of time,” says Atala. “We’re still a long way from full replacement, but I do believe that these technologies are achievable.”

      • “Abortion inducing drugs.” says the parasitic nematode Billy D.

        These fools have difficulty understanding preventative medicine.
        So damn consumed with making women suffer no matter the consequence.

        • He also, apparently, has never heard of the word “premium”. Georgetown doesn’t supply free insurance. The student is either paying a separate premium or the premium is part of tuition. I guarantee that said premium is greater than the cost of contraceptives. Assuming that the young lady is lucky enough to not get sick she is providing the insurer with a tidy profit so that they won’t ever have to charge the vile old fat fuck a single penny for anyone’s contraceptives.

          In fact, this whole canard of an insurance company taking my money to pay for other peoples care just makes my blood boil. My primary insurer is Medicare. I paid in most of my life and still pay a premium. I also still pay co-pays. And that rat bastard will insist, so long as no one hit’s him with a chair, that I am taking HIS money.

      • I just noticed in the comments section that the mom had been selling drugs as well. I guess “stealing” her son’s education was the least of her problems.

        But why is it a problem AT ALL? Would she eventually have been arrested for NOT sending her child to school?

        • I missed the drug selling part.
          She would have been at least warned and/or fined for not sending the child to school.

          If schools were equally funded and equipped which school a child attended we be of no consequence. Unfortunately they aren’t a parents have to vie for attendance.
          Here the residence address is scrutinized so ‘out of area’ aren’t ‘let in’.

    • 1. It’s veto-proof:

      1/19/2011 Introduced in House
      2/28/2011 Passed/agreed to in House: On motion to suspend the rules and pass the bill, as amended Agreed to by the Yeas and Nays: (2/3 required): 399 – 3 (Roll no. 149).
      2/6/2012 Passed/agreed to in Senate: Passed Senate with an amendment by Unanimous Consent.
      2/27/2012 Resolving differences — House actions: On motion that the House suspend the rules and agree to the Senate amendment Agreed to by the Yeas and Nays: (2/3 required): 388 – 3 (Roll no. 73).


      This Act may be cited as the `Federal Restricted Buildings and Grounds Improvement Act of 2011′.


      Section 1752 of title 18, United States Code, is amended to read as follows:
      -`Sec. 1752. Restricted building or grounds

      `(a) Whoever–
      `(1) knowingly enters or remains in any restricted building or grounds without lawful authority to do so;
      `(2) knowingly, and with intent to impede or disrupt the orderly conduct of Government business or official functions, engages in disorderly or disruptive conduct in, or within such proximity to, any restricted building or grounds when, or so that, such conduct, in fact, impedes or disrupts the orderly conduct of Government business or official functions;
      `(3) knowingly, and with the intent to impede or disrupt the orderly conduct of Government business or official functions, obstructs or impedes ingress or egress to or from any restricted building or grounds; or
      `(4) knowingly engages in any act of physical violence against any person or property in any restricted building or grounds;
      or attempts or conspires to do so, shall be punished as provided in subsection (b).
      `(b) The punishment for a violation of subsection (a) is–
      `(1) a fine under this title or imprisonment for not more than 10 years, or both, if–
      `(A) the person, during and in relation to the offense, uses or carries a deadly or dangerous weapon or firearm; or
      `(B) the offense results in significant bodily injury as defined by section 2118(e)(3); and
      `(2) a fine under this title or imprisonment for not more than one year, or both, in any other case.
      `(c) In this section–
      `(1) the term `restricted buildings or grounds’ means any posted, cordoned off, or otherwise restricted area–
      `(A) of the White House or its grounds, or the Vice President’s official residence or its grounds;
      `(B) of a building or grounds where the President or other person protected by the Secret Service is or will be temporarily visiting; or
      `(C) of a building or grounds so restricted in conjunction with an event designated as a special event of national significance; and
      `(2) the term `other person protected by the Secret Service’ means any person whom the United States Secret Service is authorized to protect under section 3056 of this title or by Presidential memorandum, when such person has not declined such protection.’.

      So, protesting at some “otherwise restricted area” could land you in prison for 10 years.

      The Courts will likely strike some of this as impermissibly overbroad and vague, violating due process. But who wants to be the test case? Cindy Sheehan could have gotten 10 years for wearing her T-Shirt of Iraq War Dead at Bush’s State of the Union Address back in ’05, had this law been in place then. (I met her in D.C. earlier that day.)

      With the votes this Bill received in Congress, it could be passed over an Obama veto. It will be interesting to see what the President does. Will he sign it, with a signing statement that will not obligate the next President in any way, shape or manner, or leave it to Congress to take away the rights of the American People to peacefully assemble?

      At any rate, if this Bill is implemented, we will finally get to see if the rumor about Bush’s detention centers/concentration camps is true. We very well could see college kids by the thousands locked up for years.

        • You’re welcome.

          Strangely, I’m not worried. I see this as part of a broader picture…necessary steps. It took some 5 million lives for Europe to wake up and say, collectively, “never again.”

          It’s still an open question as to how many American lives it will take for this country to learn its next lesson (the last being the Civil War).

          Power always seeks to consolidate more and more power. At some point, the imbalance of power reaches a tipping point. Balance is then regained, either through violence, or peaceful means. Power usually uses violent means as a measure of first resort.

          But, in the long run, the ruling class will be deposed. It is inevitable, unless they choose a peaceful means of restoring balance.

          Eventually, we will rid ourselves of the notion of killing others for the sake of our ‘good and just god.’ This new push to control everyone for the sake of a particular brand of ‘christianity’ is having the opposite effect. And that, my dear Zooey, is hope for the future.

          • Now I am confused. It seems that representative government will be a mere myth in our nation’s history. The Repugs could face a problem on September 6th when the Republican nomination is alreadyy declared for Obama under this Republican legislation, not that I care if that is the outcome!

            Why would Republicans even vote for this measure?

            • Why would Republicans even vote for this measure?

              It gives the Government unlimited power to lock up protesters.

  10. You think members of the US Congress are wealthy? They’re poor compared to the richest lawmakers on earth, who happen to reside in Beijing:

    “The richest 70 members of China’s legislature added more to their wealth last year than the combined net worth of all 535 members of the U.S. Congress, the president and his Cabinet, and the nine Supreme Court justices. The net worth of the 70 richest delegates in China’s National People’s Congress, which opens its annual session on March 5, rose to 565.8 billion yuan ($89.8 billion) in 2011, a gain of $11.5 billion from 2010, according to figures from the Hurun Report, which tracks the country’s wealthy. That compares to the $7.5 billion net worth of all 660 top officials in the three branches of the U.S. government.”

  11. Here’a a story that made my blood boil..
    Found in the comments on a foreclosure study article
    Posted by CavScout
    “bought the house in June 2006, in escrow July. got my orders to go to Iraq in August. never lived in it. lender Fremont sold to lender GMAC sold to Acqura Loan Services. 17 times it went to foreclosure sale. they were all notified that i was on active duty. none of them removed the negative reporting. i was unable to refinance because my credit score plummeted to less than 600.

    so , i had to file bankruptcy IN 2011”

    Fucking thieves!

    • Good god…the filth is permeating our entire society — top to bottom.

      I have a terrible feeling something truly awful is going to happen. On American soil, committed by Americans against Americans.

    • I certainly hope that every minority this “judge” has ever ruled against files an appeal. I would think that the ACLU and more than a few other attorneys would be happy to file cases on their behalf.

      BTW, “judge”, just because you don’t call African Americans ni99ers in public? You’re still a racist rat bastard!

    • Article III, U.S. Constitution:

      The judicial Power of the United States, shall be vested in one supreme Court, and in such inferior Courts as the Congress may from time to time ordain and establish. The Judges, both of the supreme and inferior Courts, shall hold their Offices during good Behaviour, and shall, at stated Times, receive for their Services, a Compensation, which shall not be diminished during their Continuance in Office.

      Now what do you think the odds of a Republican-controlled House, and a Republican superminority in the Senate would actually impeach and convict this judge?

      Anything over absolute zero and you’re an out-of-touch idealist. I doubt the House would even vote to censure him.

    • Yeah. Those poor kids with single parents can’t accomplish anything after suffering so. I mean, POTUS isn’t really all it’s cracked up to be. They let anyone get in these days.

    • Not “single-parenthood” but “non-marital parenthood”. Thus a non-married hetrosexual couple who have children would be automatically suspect of child abuse and neglect. This would also extend to homosexual couples who cannot, by law (in most states) get married, but may (in several states) enter into a civil union.

      Can’t you just feel the Love in a bill like that?

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