THE Watering Hole, Wednesday, 7/11/12: The New Republican Conspiracy

Tweeter scoops the Mainstream Media yet again.


According to Tweeter, The Zoo’s investigative journalist par excellance, a vast Right-Wing Conspiracy is planning an unprecedented assault on the federal judiciary:privatization.

Under their plan all Federal Courts, except for the Supreme Court, will be held privately. There is, however, a raging debate as to whether they will be owned by one or more individuals or a Corporation. A few billionaires are insisting that private ownership is the only way to truly have an independent judiciary, while others extoll the advantages to a publically traded judicial corporation.

“Imagine the thrill of holding stock in the 9th Circuit Court of Appeals” one anonymous insider told Tweeter. “Decisions that once were, well, not very interesting for the common folk, suddenly take on a whole new light when the value of your investment is at stake. With publically traded courts, everyone can invest in the judiciary. This takes jurisprudence out of the Court Room and puts it into the Board Room, where it belongs.”

Tweeter contacted a Constitutional Law Scholar for further background on this controversial plan to give ownership of the judicial branch to the public. The scholar, who chose to remain annonymous, said:

Article III of the Constitution states:

“The judicial power of the United States, shall be vested in one Supreme Court, and in such inferior courts as the Congress may from time to time ordain and establish. The judges, both of the supreme and inferior courts, shall hold their offices during good behaviour, and shall, at stated times, receive for their services, a compensation, which shall not be diminished during their continuance in office.”

This means every court below the Supreme Court is a creation of Congress, by statute. So, if Congress wants to privatize the federal judiciary, that will likely pass a constitutional challenge. Let’s face it, if Congress wanted to do away with the federal court system in its entirety, it could do so, as long as it kept the Supreme Court. Come to think of it, if Congress wanted to get rid of the Supreme Court, it probably could – after all, if it got rid of the Supreme Court, there would be no court to say what it did was unconstitutional.

The fact that no one has heard of this conspiracy is proof of its existence, as well as proof of the effectiveness of the security measures it has taken, until now, to keep this plan secret. In fact, this is supposed to be so secret, it won’t even be mentioned at the Republican Party Convention. But according to Tweeter’s sources, this conspiracy gained immense traction these past few weeks, in reaction to the Supreme Court’s ruling on Obamacare.

We here at The Zoo will keep you, are dear readers, informed of any new developments.


121 thoughts on “THE Watering Hole, Wednesday, 7/11/12: The New Republican Conspiracy

  1. Great idea but I think It needs a major image make-over and a catchy tag line to put it on par with The Hard Rock Cafe and other major casinos.
    Also, those black robes are a major buzz kill for marketing.

  2. McCain 2008: I don’t know how many houses I have.

    Romney 2012: I don’t know which countries I use to hide my money.

    • “I want you to know that if I did not believe that my policies and my leadership would help families of color — and families of any color — more than the policies and leadership of President Obama, I would not be running for president.”

      Translation: If the rich get even richer, we can afford to hire you as maids, drivers, cooks, gardeners, etc…

    • He’s got this desperate edge to his voice, and the patronizing tone is rather heavy.

      He just got a HUGE BOO for saying he’d repeal Obamacare. 😆 Now he’s trying to retrieve it by talking about a survey that says employers wouldn’t hire people if Obamacare was in place. Silence…

      Hee hee, why doesn’t he just go ahead and actually shoot himself in the foot. It would be more merciful.

    • “Freedom, opportunity, entrepreneurs, high taxation, destructive labor policies…” *puke*

      The applause is pitiful. More booing, but I missed about what.

      He’s harping on jobs, but he wants to ramp up what Bush did, which will have the same or worse effect.

      More booing.

      Still nothing on the thing this convention probably wants to hear about — Voter ID, poll taxes, etc.

    • Well at least he went to speak to them – 33 years ago he would have told them to f*** off since they were not equal to white folks according to the ‘church’ in which he holds a position of authority.

      Not his fault he has nothing to say besides “Take a little more off that hedge and then the Bentley needs a wax job when you are done”

    • Imbeciles. Foreign countries are allowed to regulate guns without the interference of the NRA. The head of the NRA is a paranoid idiot always making up “maybe this will happen” stories. Perhaps he should take up writing fiction as he already lives in a fictional world.

    • …could expose the records of America’s gun owners to foreign governments…

      How naive if they don’t already know “foreign governments” can access any information they desire, at any time.

  3. QOTD:

    “The RNC has done very little since I left office to expand on the work that we had done in this area. They’ve got a website, God bless them. It’s always good to put a website up with some black faces on it. Outreach.” — Michael Steele, former RNC chair and muppet impersonator.

    • Because that will convince Black people to vote Republican. And if any of them are browsing Republican campaign websites. And by “them” I mean anyone at all.

    • “I mean we could have made sure we got lapdances from some AA dancers as well as the white trash ones on our expense bills – that would be easy!?!” – Michael Steele – Equal Opportunity Lapdance Buyer

  4. A troll over at the Plum Line responded to the NAACP boos Mittens story by proclaiming that “they also gave him a standing ovation.” Which is true. They did that when he entered, before he started speaking. I call it simple respect for someone who has become the Republican candidate for President. Of course they applauded.

    But their response during the speech and afterward doesn’t demonstrate much regard. D’oh. Now Mittens can claim “I tried! I got down and funky wit’ them blacks but they don’t understand.”

    • Never understood why people give standing ovations all the time for nothing, they seem to be so ubitquitous to be cheapened.

  5. Romney NAACP reax:

    “I believe his vested interests are in white Americans,” said Charlette Stoker Manning, chair of Women in NAACP. “You cannot possibly talk about jobs for black people at the level he’s coming from. He’s talking about entrepreneurship, savings accounts — black people can barely find a way to get back and forth from work.” Pointing to what she sees as Romney’s lack of interaction with the poor African-Americans, Manning added, “It’s such a big gap in what he’s attempting to sell us.” …

    Dedrick Muhammad, the director of the NAACP Economic Department, chalked up the perceived tone-deafness to the fact that Romney spends most of his time on the campaign trail talking to white, middle-class audiences in rural and suburban areas. “He knew to bring up great civil rights stalwarts and quote them, but he still seems to have great distance in understanding the needs of our community,” said Muhammad. “Instead of just throwing out buzzwords — ‘charter schools,’ ‘free enterprise’ — you can’t just say that to us and get a positive reception.”

    This was all about showing indies or undecideds that Mitt is trying and reaching out. M’ok.

    • Oh I am all over that like a private equity firm.

      I know I’m gonna win! Despite what they say in the preamble.

      I love the ones that are around that people look at them and go “Hey wait a second …”

      Changing my avatar to the one I made up a few years ago.

  6. “Why they hate Amurka” Episdoe #??? – the Laos edition.

    Bombed by Nixon and Kissinger by more tonnage was than used on Germany and Japan *combined* in WW2 (yes read that again slowly), Laos have millions of reasons they step on everyday to continue to hate Amurka.

    Hillary Clinton is there today. you can read about the US State Department’s dissembling, slights and continued unwillingness to do a damn thing about cluster bombs, either the millions still littering the Laos countryside or the ones it will giove to Israel in its next adventure into the fields of Lebanon, Gaza or Syria or whereever.

    Alternet covers the story in depth – Shame on you HIllary. – The visit to Laos was covered on NPR today – not in this depth at all.

    • …These bombs could not destroy buildings or tanks but were designed to maim not kill human beings in the hopes of tying up others to care for them; how steel pellets were replaced by flechettes meant to tear more flesh if one tried to remove them than they had entering the body;…

      … (Sec. of State) She is scheduled to make a “feel good” visit to the COPE center, which provides prosthetic limbs to the victims of U.S. cluster bombs, and will likely boast about the $470,000 the U.S. annually contributes to its funding.

      A paltry sum – shame on the U.S., even more, shame on the SoS!

      We are the epitome of uncaring; an “exceptionally” evil empire.

  7. Says the man who became rich by sending jobs – some of these people may have had – to other countries.

    Romney to NAACP: Economy is ‘worse for African-Americans in almost every way’ | The Ticket – Yahoo! News

    “I believe that if you understood who I truly am in my heart, and if it were possible to fully communicate what I believe is in the real, enduring best interest of African-American families, you would vote for me for president,” Romney said.

  8. 212 years ago today Aaron Burr bets Alexander Hamilton $10 that he can kill him in a duel.

    Hamilton loses bet but gets immortalized on currency. Burr credited as the first to say, “get off my lawn!”

  9. I’ll just bet that the next speech Rmoney gives in front of an adoring crowd he’ll reference and compare it to the NAACP speech — and he’ll insert his Bruno Maglis into his mouth.

  10. Just noticed on MSN, a photo of the late Penn State football coach Joe Paterno with the caption ‘This is not a football scandal’ below it.

    I’m thinking no, it’s more about how those in power and authority and in high places at Penn State chose not only to protect their pal but to also protect the reputation the Penn State football program and more importantly the name and reputation of Penn State as an institution, the school. But lets toss that in there to distract from reality.

    The bigger story to me is how such trusted and respected figures and institutions in our society will so freely throw away any morals, values and decency they may believe in, all to protect highly esteemed public figures or institutions. Those involved in the Penn State cover up chose to protect the institute of Penn State over the sexual crimes committed on children. Sound familiar? (Clue: The head honcho wears a pointy hat and sits in a throne.)

    The bottom line is, it is apparent, by their actions (or non action) and silence, that the lives of all these children didn’t mean shit to those involved in the coverup. This is nothing new. Corporations have covered up many horrendous acts and crimes they’ve committed around the globe just as man have through out our history.

    Oh my God! Corporations are really just like people…. or are people really just like corporations!?!


  11. Right. Just like Mitch McConnell and the GOP has allowed everything to come to the floor for a vote.

    You reap what you sow.

    The Senate must also vote on ObamaCare | Fox News

    t is incumbent on Sen. Mitch McConnell and all of the Senate Republicans to do everything in their power to force Harry Reid to do his job and call the repeal legislation to the floor for a vote. It is not enough to ask the Democrats nicely for a vote. Republican Senators must insist that the Senate cannot proceed onto anything else until ObamaCare comes to a vote; and then they must follow through.

    • Whatever happened to focusing on jobs-jobs-jobs! The republicans are rolling the dice with the repeal of Obamacare. They were stunned by the Roberts decision. Or so they seemed…

      Frightfully, with the way the right wing is able to hammer home their propaganda so effectively to the minds of millions through the media, Obamacare may very well be Obama’s Waterloo.

      Lots of stupid and/or uninformed American people out there who don’t care, don’t pay attention or just don’t understand how the republican party, in an all out effort have tried to succeed at making President Obama a term president.

      What a lot of people don’t get is that in doing so, the republican party have blatantly shown that they are willing to take down the whole country in order to gain back power.

      • Interestingly, so sure were they that they’d have it struck down, they kept saying they wouldn’t spike the ball when the decision was announced.

        We should have asked them to not have a hissy fit if the decision didn’t go their way. Because they’re having one heck of a hissy fit.

  12. To the democrats and any decent political bobble head out there:

    The next time you host or are a guest on a program with a republican opponent who babbles on about how eliminating the Bush tax cuts would be a tax increase, could you please politely point out to them that in reality the Bush tax cuts are not a tax increase, that the Bush tax cuts in reality was just an eleven year tax holiday and a colossal failure at creating jobs.

    Then could you also point out to these deceivers that the Bush tax cuts were never negotiated to become permanent, that there was an original sunset date for the law and the tax cuts to expire where as everyone would be taxed back at their normal rates, before the Bush tax cuts became a temporary law.

    Thank You.

  13. On Rmoney’s NAACP speech: I was a white suburban kid who was bused to an inner city minority high school. The polite term among whites of that day for our darker brethren was “colored people”. If you referred to your classmates with that term all within hearing would politely inquire “What color?”. 🙂
    Thanks for thinking about me above Liberty Lover. I’m living in hell here. My house is condemned. Hearing on the placement of the children is tomorrow. I reckon I’ll have to actually put on make-up. Pork sales today were brisk, probably will pay for about 15 minutes of hazmat crew time.

      • Check later in yesterday’s thread for the beginning of the story of Outstanding’s new tribulations, courtesy of her former? DIL.

        • The grandkids are holding up pretty well, all things considered. They throng like flies to sugar when I cook, hanging out on chairs and watching, wanting to help.

          The separation is official and my DIL has admitted she has been having an affair with her platonic bf. I feel like I’m living in a cheap soap opera sometimes but then I hear about Outstanding’s plight and I think, oh well, could be a lot worse.

            • They have nowhere else to go. Good news is, their mom isn’t. My son told here if she doesn’t want to be married then she damn well better stop accepting my help.

            • Sorry to hear of this badger friend. Say nothing and just keep the children safe and secure. By the way, never rent a home to your ex-DIL.

        • I have no insurance. I called today and was informed that not only does my insurance not cover meth lab, my insurance is cancelled and I’ll be damned lucky if they don’t cancel the policy on my farm and other rental house, this from a man I’ve trusted for 25 years.. I am responsible for finding and paying a hazmat crew to clean the home, and am not allowed to enter until the county receives certification that the hazard has been corrected. House and lot are probably worth about 150K in todays market, pre-destruction. I’ve no clue if the DEA etc. will try bill me for the removal of the meth lab.

  14. Hi, gang. Just checking in. I’ve been building a new RC glider which has turned into more of a project than I had thought but it’s going to be pretty sweet. Of course, after spending all that time hunched over I’m probably going to need a couple days for my neck to stop throbbing enough to actually fly it. The best part is taking a few days off from politics. The world is a bit brighter when one isn’t constantly reading about fools and assholes!

    Well? Back to the salt mine. Have a great evening.

    • Hey pete!
      Good to know you’re alive and occupied. Other than work, I’ve immersed (literally) with the new waterproof camera.
      Spent last weekend up in a mountain river taking fish pictures. The (trout) quickly get used to me in the swirling bubbles, and seem to be curious about the bright blue and silver camera, and come quite close. I found out rather quickly that I need a snorkel.

  15. I couldn’t take the level of racism over at Plum Line any longer. These are mostly not regulars, but all in agreement that Black people are all on welfare, all racist, all deadbeat, all grasping for freebies, and all tricked by Liberals into supporting issues that are BAD for the Blacks. I need a drink and stupid tv.

  16. Preface: I am an alumni of Texas Tech University. Over the years, I have refused to donate to the college (I always specify that any money I give needs to go to the Science Department) because of who they have hired to represent the college. My first refusal to donate was when they hired Bobby night after he was fired from Indiana. The second time was when Texas Tech hired Alberto Gonzales to teach political science.

    Upshot: I received a postcard in the mail informing me that they will add my name back to the contact list unless I contacted them to tell them not to contact me. (Something is wrong with that, but I digress.) I went online to see if Alberto Gonzales still worked there and he left the college in January to go to teach at “a Nashville, Tenn.-based Christian university.”

    I’m not surprised, are you?

  17. Five House Dems joined the repiggies in voting to repeal Obamacare: Reps. Boren (OK), Kissell (NC), Matheson (UT), McIntyre (NC), and Ross (AR).

    They need to be GONE, but as long as there’s a D behind a name, the DNC doesn’t seem to care how they vote.

  18. Mitt Romney Tried to Rig NAACP Crowd by Flying in His Own African Americans

    Romney said, “I spoke with a number of African-American leaders after the event and they said, you know a lot of folks don’t want to say they’re not going to be voting for Barack Obama, but they’re disappointed in his lack of policies to improve our schools. Disappointed in urban policies, disappointed in the economy. 14.4% rate of unemployment among African-Americans today. The president has not been able to get the job done. People want to see someone who can get the economy going, so I expect to get African-American votes.”

    Romney also claimed that he got a standing ovation at the end of his speech.

    Many of Romney’s claims were debunked by Senior Vice President for Advocacy and Policy and the Director of the Washington Bureau of the NAACP, Hilary Shelton who said that the only African Americans Romney met with after his speech were those that he brought with him. Mr. Shelton explained that Mitt Romney flew in his own African-American supporters who were not affiliated with the NAACP, in order to have some people in the crowd cheering for him.

    Wow. 😯

    I have so many smartassed cracks to make, but I think I won’t…

    • The ovation was because he was leaving.

      Mitt flew in some of his “best friends” (as in some of my best friends are….)

      The only way Romney will win in November is for him to lie about everything. And to suppress the vote. Oh wait.

  19. Politico’s Joe Williams was fired for saying that Romney couldn’t relate to black people. If he’d said that tonight, he might still be employed.

  20. My Honeybump ate her dinner this evening with as much greedy gusto as she has before — even minus 13 teeth.

    She’s going to be just fine. 🙂

      • Heh.
        I do have my own room, and it comes with it’s own perils,
        like having to wait in line for the washing machine.
        It presents, or rather I should say wafts, that singular odor of the working man who comes home to a space exactly the way it was left in the morning.

  21. This has to be the most Obama-esque anti-Obama ad of all time, from the Tea Party affiliated Patriot Super PAC. You won’t last for the whole thing:

  22. Romney’s response to being booed at the NAACP:

    “Remind them of this, if they want more stuff from government tell them to go vote for the other guy – more free stuff. But don’t forget nothing is really free.”

    Red meat, dog whistle bullshit for the racist base. Un-fucking-believable.

    I’m thinking the NAACP and the black community will no longer be generous with that asshole.

    • I doubt they ever saw this asshole as anything other than what he is. They may be sort of polite, raised that way and all that, but folk who’ve dealt with racism all their lives can smell the stink from this turd a country mile away.

      • He said he expected to get booed at the NAACP, but saying this later no makes the whole thing seem like craven manipulation.

        Ugh, even repiggies have never liked this guy, and I find him more disgusting and creepy than ever before.

        • There’s that word I was missing! If I had to sum up Mitt in one word, craven would do very nicely.

    • Loser.

      Republicans must be quaking at the thought of being the party of losers for the last 12 years.

      Yes, I’m including Cheney/Bush. They are, and were, after all, losers.

  23. “According to government documents reviewed by Mother Jones, Romney, when he was in charge of Bain, invested heavily in a Chinese manufacturing company that depended on US outsourcing for its profits—and that explicitly stated that such outsourcing was crucial to its success.”


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