The Dry Hole, Wednesday, April 8, 2015

California is on its way to become another dust bowl. Some estimates predict the State has one more year of water left.

One year. That’s counting the reservoirs and groundwater.

As a result, the State is enacting some pretty tight restrictions on water use, for human consumption. People, who use about 10% of the State’s annual consumption of water, will be asked to cut back on watering their yards to two days a week.

Agriculture, on the other hand, won’t face any restrictions. As a result, some farmers are continuing to plant new orchards.

Fracking will go on, as usual, consuming millions of gallons of potable water, and polluting countless millions of gallons more with toxic wastes filtering into the groundwater supply.

One central valley city has taken a unique approach to saving water. Fresno converted all of its firefighting equipment from pumping water to blasting dirt. The fire hoses now blast out a steady stream of dirt, much like a sandblaster, to put out flames.

The town set up a dredging operation in the Fresno riverbed, which has been dry for years. Sand and dirt is then loaded into dump trucks that follow the fire trucks to the scene of a fire. A typical residential fire can be extinguished with about a half a dump truck load. After the fire is put out, a clean-up crew sweeps up the dirt and sand, which is then strained to remove any coals, ash or other impurities and reloaded into the dump truck. The city estimates about 80% of the dirt and sand will be recovered in this manner.

While city officials are congratulating themselves at this innovative way to save water, residents are not so pleased. Every time there’s a fire, long lines form at the car washes, to wash the falling dust off all the cars that happened to be downwind of the blaze.

In other news, Rand Paul announced his candidacy for the President of the United States. His former High School immediately edited its online version of Rand’s Senior Yearbook, dubbing him “Least Likely to Succeed.”

Oh pen
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68 thoughts on “The Dry Hole, Wednesday, April 8, 2015

  1. It can’t possible make sense to irrigate alfalfa and then ship the hay to China.

      • Alfalfa has one genuine agricultural virtue: it enriches the soil nitrogen level which helps feed the next crop in the rotation, thereby reducing fertilizer costs. Alfalfa, because of it’s extensive root system loosens up the soil as well, making tillage a bit easier, at least for the first rotation crop. It does use a lot of water, though, and the crop itself isn’t good for much other than as a food source for cattle and horses.

    • This area is know for it’s specialty alfalfa, all irrigated and shipped…..China?….I’d have to ask about. China would surely have a region that could produce alfalfa. It’s a vast country with varying climate conditions.

    • Agricultural irrigation water use is typically measured in acre feet, where one acre foot = 43560 cu.ft. One cu.ft. = ~7.5 gallons, so 43560 cu.ft. = 326,700 gallons. A 100 acre crop that requires an acre foot of water therefore needs 32,670,000 gallons of water. Cotton, in hot/dry climes, typically uses at least 4 acre feet — and that’s for a crop that has long been federally subsidized because the market price has seldom been high enough to recoup the growing/harvesting cost. Currently even China and Egypt are subsidizing their cotton crops, a solid indication that there’s a worldwide surplus of cotton.

      I don’t know if California still grows cotton like it did some years ago, but if it does I should think that cotton should be the very first crop to go. Food crops? Useful, but still the bottom line is that the entire state of California is soon to be in deep waterless do-do because of climate change. It’s hard to imagine what will happen if/when it’s effectively out of water, period, although I would hope that nary a single Republican will ever again get so much as one vote in any election!

    • CA feeds this nation and the world. Export is part of our economy.
      Additionally, some areas are always low in rainfall and have used conservation practices for years.
      AND tgere is one area that I know of that gets their wayer from the desert growers ( growing your food, as well as for the livestock ( fiod too).

  2. On the morning of 9/11 while I drove in the car with my wife and daughter, the news reports made it clear that what had happened was intentional. I told them right there that our world has changed forever, and for the worse. We have no idea where this will lead but it won’t be good for any of us.

    I had somewhat of the same reaction to mandatory water reductions in our state. Except this is far more dangerous. Most people out here just don’t get it. They turn on the tap, water comes out. What’s the problem? No, really, lots of people are just that stupid.

    On the radio yesterday morning, with rain in the forecast for later in the day, the weather guy said two jaw dropping points: “we expect a heavy rain later in the day, with 1/4″ inch to possibly as much as 1/2 inch.” That constitutes “heavy” rain now.

    The other WTF? was some advice he gave: “When there’s rain in the forecast, you might want to turn off the automatic timers on your sprinklers to save some water.” SRSLY. You might want. People have to be told this because stupid.

    • I believe we are witnessing the beginning of the Earth’s self-regulating defense against Man’s assault to it’s health. With population growth and increasing demands for resources there will come a point where billions of people will died from disease, famine and conflicts, small and large, all made worse with natural weather events born from the heat of humanity. Its so ironic that the element that life is based on, Carbon, with also be the cause of many, many deaths.

      • Yup, sitting in the sauna at the gym the other night…. where philosophy and sports and the topics, sometimes at the same time…. dude says something like: “yup population keeps rising and is competing for fewer and fewer resources” – your correspondent and part-time Methuselah commented – “no problem, mon capitan, one of those things is going get fixed real soon” – that was a buzz killer.

      • The Sixth Mass Extinction will most certainly be human-caused, and while it’s most likely that not all life on earth will die off in the process, the event will certainly allow evolution a second shot at coming up with an intelligent life form. Maybe next time nature will get it right and leave out the faulty and self-destructive Republican gene.

          • Since the end of WWII the human population has more than doubled and is still increasing at near the same rate. When that trend is reversed, when the population growth reverses and starts going as rapidly down, then we’ll know our days are numbered.

            • My kids are pissed off that their life expectancies are less than mine – “dude you made a big mess of stuff! Now we are going to die young – thanks Obama!”

              I’m like “Yeah, whatever…. I got mine, one of you needs to wipe my bum when I get senile….m’kay?” – went down like a ham sandwich at a bar-mitzvah.

    • Where I live, rain is measured in HUNDRETHS OF AN INCH. but that is normal calculation for the area. And ANY precioitation is a “storm”.TV stations go on storm watch. 😎

  3. I think it’s really cute how Rand Paul calls himself a “Washington outsider” while he runs for Senator and President at the same time.

  4. The stoopid burns!

    So. I was waiting in line at the pharmacy and the ladies in front of me were discussing the signs of the apocalypse. I was managing to ignore them until one lady opined that the “blood moons” are a warning that God is angry and I just couldn’t keep my mouth shut. I informed her that every single eclipse has been fixed since the moment that the earth’s and moon’s orbits stabilized and that anyone who has lived since Issac Newton and bothered to take the time could actually predict eclipses, their location, duration, and degree of totality. Plus. “Blood moons” have occurred since before the dawn of Man and still have yet to bring about the end of days.

    Judging by the looks of absolute vapidity that greeted my little speech I thought that the exchange might end there when the first lady said; “you can believe anything you want but I’ll put my faith in God”. Why? I asked. Why would you place your faith in an alleged being who is willing to destroy the human race because some guys in Massachusetts married each other? That’s when lady number 2 said “he’s not saved” in much the same way that one might say “he’s a cannibal”. I’m actually pleasantly surprised that I didn’t get loud and rude when I simply said “the only thing I need to be saved from is the stupidity of people who should know better”. Then I decided to do some other shopping and went back to the pharmacy later.

    • No matter how much you medicate, those people will still exist.

      I might have screwed with them and said something like, “Oh yeah, Blood Moon Rising, by CCR. That was a groovy 70’s song, eh: “Hope you got your things together. Hope you are quite prepared to die.” Then laugh maniacally.

    • I hope I don’t ever overhear stupid people like that. I doubt I could be as polite as you. My Native New York Sarcasm would kick in and I’d be throwing out put downs left and right. Your response was brilliant, but if someone is going to confront your Science with “I’ll put my faith in God”, they deserve to be publicly ridiculed and shamed because they are simpletons who really shouldn’t speak in public. Unfortunately, stupidity is not a barrier to voting, even though it should be. But it will never be so or else the Republicans would have no one left to vote for them, except the incredibly greedy.

      • I did lose my cool the other night when I overheard a woman complain about how bad Obama has been. I dared ask what her biggest problem was and when she said it was the President disrespecting the Marines by not saluting them. My vociferate reply to her was that was the dumbest thing to say. I added that there was no legal requirement requiring the President to salute and the issue was just another stupid right-wing diversion from more important issues. The 58 year-old woman couldn’t handle the truth and she quickly left with her 32 year-old boy toy husband!

        • You are correct in that the Commander-in-Chief does not have to return salutes. The only reason he even bothers is to make the person feel good. (Oh, boy, the C-in-C returned my salute.)

          • Never got that shit…. you Amurkans love to confuse the C-in-C and the civil leader answerable to the population and the law…. it looks cheesy and stupid when the Prez does it….

            … just acknowledge the young Marines who are doing their job proudly and move on…. not saluting reinforces the statement – “I am a civil leader, the population holds me to account, I do not need to enforce my military position – savvy?”

      • I was lucky. It became obvious that they were just so vacuous that any attempt to educate them would have been futile and getting angry and unloading a little angst would have been about as satisfying as beating up a child. A small, blind, child confined to a wheelchair. Still. My patience does have limits and I figured that it would be best to retreat before I found myself jumping up and down and screaming obscenities.

      • I thought it about Russell Wilson’s stupid pass but just late, or maybe divine retribution visited on Indiana religious schools for Teh Gay … whatever the fook I can come up with right now.

  5. Dzhokhar Tsarnaev convicted in Boston Marathon bombing – First eight counts, so far.

    • Disappointing for Harry, but hey I don’t care who you are, that’s funny right thar!

  6. Still more Rand fail.

    Paul Mixes Up New Hampshire History in Invoking State Motto

    Here’s the Stark truth: Kentucky Sen. Rand Paul on Wednesday mixed up the origins of New Hampshire’s “Live Free or Die” motto.

    Paul opened his first New Hampshire speech as a declared Republican presidential candidate in Milford, telling a crowd that “when the founders of New Hampshire came up with the motto ‘Live Free or Die’, they didn’t leave a lot of wiggle room.”

    But that phrase didn’t become the state motto until 1945, and it wasn’t a state founder who came up with it.

    Gen. John Stark included the phrase in a letter to fellow Revolutionary War veterans who had invited him to a reunion in 1809 — 130 years after New Hampshire became a separate British colony. Declining the invitation due to poor health, his letter included a toast: “Live Free Or Die; Death Is Not The Worst Of Evils.”

    Well, at least it wasn’t Paul Revere.

    • Wouldn’t it be great if there was still journalistic integrity in this country? The only question any self-respecting journalist should be asking Mr. Paul is; “could you have fucked up the launch of your campaign any more? At this point shouldn’t you just slink off to some remote swamp and pray that a few people might forget you’re so effing stupid?”

      Sigh… What we will witness from the “librul media” is an endless line of lap puppies asking stuff like “why is it unfair for your political opponents to attack you for your firmly held beliefs”. FAUX”News”, on the other hand, will go with “we’re so glad we have you to stand up to the evil far-left loons and you’re just so freakin’ awesome that now we will devote the rest of the segment to pimping your PACs and generally grovelling for big money”.

      • Rand Paul Goes off on Savannah Guthrie for Saying He’s ‘Changed His Positions’

      • Rand Paul: I’m Short Tempered ‘With Both Male And Female Reporters’

        • Well, then, that makes it alright.
          A short temper doesn’t bode well for someone wanting to be POTUS.

          • They can’t all be “happy drunks” like Dubbya. Of course, in his case, the vapid grin was concealing a sadistic psychopath.

    • Hardeharhar….. Paul Revere….

      Paul going for the Bible Spice vote in a big way here…

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