“Against stupidity the gods themselves contend in vain.”
Friday the Thirteenth is supposed to mean bad luck, something like that. So I’ve decided to lend a hand and offer huge piles of bad luck to a small handful of really DESERVING candidates. I won’t elaborate; as you will see, there is no need to do so when the candidates have already . . . ummm . . . elaborated?
Without further ado, first there’s Ted Cruz, presidential candidate, who will be doubling down on Saturday at a “Rally For Religious Freedom” in South Carolina. Recall that last weekend, Cruz spoke at a rally in Iowa held by the nutcase preacher who advocates execution of gays; this week, Cruz will speak at the rally where activists preach that gays are really Satanic manifestations. Ted will be accompanied by his daddy, Rafael Cruz, who has already blamed the SCOTUS gay marriage decision on (who else) The Devil!
Conclusion: Ted Cruz is (legitimately) nuts.
Next we learn that Duck Dynasty “stars” are rallying to support the Louisiana gubernatorial candidacy of Diaper Dave Vitter. As Dynasty’s Willie Robertson puts it, “I know he’s made some mistakes, but who hasn’t? The whole story of the Bible is about redemption, and I’m concerned about our state.”
Conclusion: Gays might be the work of the Devil, but US Senators who get caught hanging with hookers while wearing a diaper? No problem. No biggee. No Debbil. . Redeemable. Like a coupon.
Meanwhile, pHuckabee claims he’s innocent, that he had NO IDEA that (Reverend?) Kevin Swanson’s ‘religious freedom’ ideas included the execution of gay people. That — IN SPITE of the fact that the whole thing had been cussed and discussed for most of the week in advance of the event. I mean, even *I* knew about Swanson’s absurd thesis, and we don’t even have cable TV!
Conclusion: pHuckabee just might tell a lie, every now and then.
“You see, if you’re very, very stupid, how can you possibly realize
that you’re very, very stupid? You’d have to be relatively intelligent
to realize how stupid you are.”
(John Cleese; January 2015)