About Wayne A. Schneider

I'm a Liberal, Libertarian, Atheist Humanist. I believe that though the world is a dangerous place, it can be made better if we stop dividing ourselves by how we're different from each other, and reach out to each other through what we have in common. And that is that we are all human beings on this planet. Please remember that.

Smells Like Trump Spirit (A Song Parody)

Here’s Nirvana to tell you why Trump is dangerous.

Smells Like Trump Spirit
Based on “Smells Like Teen Spirit” by Nirvana
Original lyrics and music by Chris Novoselic, David Grohl, and Kurt Cobain ©1991 Warner/Chappell Music, Inc
Additional lyrics by Wayne A. Schneider ©2018

They all got guns, warn your friends
They always lose but still pretend
He’s overboard and self-adored
You know he’s just a dirty whore
He’ll go so low, who knows how low
He’ll go so low, who knows how low
He’ll go so low, who knows how low
He’ll go so low, who knows

When he tweets out, he’s so dangerous
But he needs to entertain us
It’s so stupid but contagious
So we let him entertain us
A potato, a white rhino, a bandito, no libido
Yeah, hey

Continue reading

Weep For America

OMFG! This man is insane! Donald J. Trump has no perceivable grounding in Reality. He starts off with a lie about the Empire State Building. Now, you might say I’m quibbling (and I would congratulate you on your extensive, if slightly misused, vocabulary) but there’s a reason Donald did it. He’s setting up a contrast between how long it took to build the Empire State Building (*) and how long it takes to build new “highways” (I wasn’t aware the Interstate Highway System was expanding so much), a difference he blames entirely on regulations. No other reasons, just regulations. Never mind, Donald, that the REASON for all those regulations was one word – experience. We learned what could go wrong if you didn’t make people follow certain codes. (Good example by an American company overseas: KBR and the electrocuting showers. That’s what no regulations gets you. Also see: Somalia.) He claims he could have built the latest new highway he saw in a state he wouldn’t name for less money and faster. Those of us who know of him and his history know it’s because he doesn’t follow regulations. BTW, if you haven’t already checked, Donald claimed the Empire State Building was built in eleven months. If you do the Google search suggested below, you’ll see it clearly says it took one year and forty-five days to complete. Donald wanted to minimize how long it took (without any mention of the lives lost) to build it. Just because he likes to exaggerate and make himself seem more important, knowledgeable, and useful than he really is.

Near the end, when asked how race relations can be improved, he answers that things will get better once jobs come back, good-paying jobs, and everyone is making more money, then we’ll see race relations improve. Yes. Seriously. He said that. He thinks money solves all problems, even centuries of institutional racism in America. It’s as if suddenly all the managers are going to be black and making more money, and then they’ll be happier and they won’t complain about the fact their local bank still won’t give them a fucking mortgage.

Then he brags about his winery in Charlottesville.

There are several times during the presser when he says “Excuse me. Excuse me.”, usually following some “chatter”. If you’ve ever seen The President Show with Anthony Atamuniak (that’s close to his name) as Donald Trump, you will hear his impersonation. And you’ll laugh to yourself. And if you’re in public at the time, it could get you some strange looks. I’m just sayin’.
So enjoy the interview. Then curl up with a nice bottle somewhere and weep gently for this country.
Then go out and fucking VOTE!

(*) If you start to type “How long did it take” into Google, the first option on the list is “…to build the Empire State Building”. I’m guessing a lot of people did what I did and fact-checked Donald and instantly found him wrong. Again.

https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/the-fix/wp/2017/08/15/trumps-off-the-rails-news-conference-on-charlottesville-the-alt-left-and-infrastructure-annotated/?utm_term=.335966271167

Einstein Was Right – Again

Sagittarius A* (it’s unclear to me if the asterisk is an official part of its name, or is just there to indicate a strike-shortened season) is a Super Massive Black Hole (SMBH) at the center of the Milky Way Galaxy (the one you’re sitting in right now.) Scientists have observed at least three stars orbiting it, as depicted in this courtroom artists’ sketch:

Artist’s impression of the orbits of three of the stars very close to the supermassive black hole at the center of the Milky Way. – Image Credit: ESO/M. Parsa/L. Calçada

By going through years of photos taken by several telescopes, scientists were able to confirm Einstein’s Theory of General Relativity regarding planetary motion around a very heavy object.

Marzieh Parsa – a PhD student at the University of Cologne, Germany and lead author of the paper – was understandably excited with these results. As she stated in an ESO press statement:

“The Galactic Center really is the best laboratory to study the motion of stars in a relativistic environment. I was amazed how well we could apply the methods we developed with simulated stars to the high-precision data for the innermost high-velocity stars close to the supermassive black hole.”

There. You learned something new today. What else have you been hearing about? Tell us all about it.

The Watering Hole, Monday, May 8, 2017: Preserve Net Neutrality

The new FCC Commissioner, whoever he is, doesn’t believe in protecting net neutrality. And why not? He used to be a lawyer for Verizon. (The president who appointed him doesn’t even understand the concept of net neutrality, so there’s no help there.) On last night’s “Last Week Tonight”, John Oliver explained why ISPs were now able to be governed by the FCC. In short, ISPs were re-classified as businesses that could be governed under Title II of the Communications Act, instead of under Title I where the Supreme Court said the FCC lacked that authority. This new commissioner doesn’t seem to understand why it was necessary to do that, and thinks it’s really bad and should be changed. You must tell them No. In addition to contacting your Members of Congress, you can leave a comment on the FCC’s Comments page, if you can find it. Since it was changed from the much simpler comment system from three years ago, one has a right to assume they deliberately want to make it harder for you to complain and then say later, “Well, nobody used the comment system to complain.” This was how Fox News Channel defended their star host, Bill O’Reilly, from claims of sexual harassment – that nobody used the internal complaint system to complain, so they have a hard time believing any of it happened. John Oliver explained the tedious process of what you would now have to go through just to get to the FCC’s comments page. He and his great staff wanted to make it easier for you to get there, so they created this website:

go fcc yourself dot com

It skips through the confusing pages and inconveniently located links to get to where you can leave a comment to tell them to preserve net neutrality and Title II. If it works. I tried it and it seemed to go to a mostly blank page except for a little blue circle with a person’s outline in it. Maybe he crashed the FCC’s commenting system just like he did three years ago. Well, his viewers did.

Now, please go there and tell them to what to do, and then enjoy today’s open thread.

The Watering Hole, Saturday, April 29, 2017: Presidenting Is Hard

In an interview with Reuters, Donald J. Trump, the man who did not win by the largest electoral vote total for a Republican (even since Reagan), actually said, “This [being president] is more work than in my previous life. I thought it would be easier.” This may be because Trump did not know that the entire White House staff would have to be replaced when he took office. He learned this when he sat down with President Obama after winning the election. Apparently no one on his campaign staff knew that either, including his future Chief of Staff and RNC Chairman Reince Priebus.

So I want to send a great big “FUCK YOU!” to every American who voted for this ignorant, egomaniacal, narcissistic, xenophobic, misogynistic, white nationalist, dictator-loving shit stain on the fabric of our society. Read a fucking book! Try to learn exactly what the government is responsible for doing and how it’s done. Learn about the three branches of government and how they interact with each other. Then try to understand why it is so important to put people in those positions who know what the fuck they’re doing! Try to understand why, no, you don’t want an “outsider” elected to the highest public office in the land for his first job as a public servant. Especially when he surrounds himself with similarly inexperienced people who want nothing but to destroy the liberal framework of our society. You idiot Trump supporters elected a man who is going to take away many of the government services upon which most of you depend. (Read that last sentence back to yourselves a few times. The sentence structure may look funny, but it’s what we call “grammatically correct.”) In other words, your lives are about to take a sharp turn for the worse. That’s the price you’re going to pay for your stupidity. Your only hope is to learn. Somehow.

This is a tweet by the Rogue POTUS Staff account, which is generally accepted to be real inside people tweeting about real inner workings in the White House, so there’s a good chance this is not entirely made up stuff. It will make you laugh, but it should unnerve you a little and make you want to get him out of there legally and as soon as possible. He certainly needs mental health treatment, so it’s a good thing Obamacare covers that.

This is our daily open thread. Fell free to leave a cathartic rant upon any subject you wish.

The Watering Hole, Monday, April 10, 2017: Open Thread

Oh, and in case you missed the anti-trump 6-part series by the L.A. Times Editorial Board, here’s a link to Part I, “Our Dishonest President”. Links to the rest of the series are included at the top of the first piece. Caveat: I have not read all of them, as they are difficult to read when one’s outrage level keeps going up to eleven.

A Nutty Day (A Song Parody)

I love Sir Paul McCartney, and I have nothing but the deepest admiration, awe, and respect for his musical genius and creativity, and I would never dare make a claim that I could do anything better than he when it came to music. But there is one rather small, almost insignificant complaint I have (other than the official lyrics of “Live and Let Die” where he sings “And if this ever-changing world in which we live in [sic],” which can easily be corrected by changing them to “And if this ever-changing world in which we’re livin’,” and nobody would know the difference), and it’s that some of his most beautiful melodies are also his most saddest songs. Take “She’s Leaving Home.” Such a beautiful tune, and yet such a sad, sad song. “Cried For No One,” is another one. I love that tune and yet it’s hard to feel happy when singing it. And the third one, the one below, “Another Day,” is another great tune with such a sad story. One of my personal goals in all these years of writing song parodies was to take one of those sad Paul McCartney songs and turn it into a happy melody we could have fun singing. I hope I succeeded. And I hope I don’t offend my musical idol, Sir Paul McCartney, without whom a great many bass players would not know how to play, and I wouldn’t have been able to write parodies of “Lady Madonna,” “I’ve Just Seen A Face,” “Revolution,” (I’m sure he helped John out here and there) “Too Many People,” “Eleanor Rigby,” “Here, There, and Everywhere,” “The Night Before,” “Another Girl,” and the entire “Let It Be” album. Thank you, Sir Paul, and I hope you enjoy this one. Maybe you could sing it for us and give us an even happier tune to enjoy even more, even if it is true. 🙂

This is a typical day in the life of Donald J. Trump, so-called President Of The United States. Or as the acronym that’s most often used on the internet goes, Continue reading

The Weekend Hole, Sat-Sun, January 14-15, 2017: Everything’s Alt-right (A Song Parody)

One of the greatest rock operas (and one of my personal favorites) is “Jesus Christ Superstar,” a story about a nice Jewish boy who went into his father’s business. (A Jewish friend from the development I grew up in used to tell me that joke.) This particular parody is based on the very popular song from that musical, “Everything’s Alright.” I feel bad because try as I might, I could not find any suitable video, or even audio clip, to post so you can follow along. But it MUST be from the original Broadway musical, and NOT the film which sucked hugely. If you use a clip from that, it won’t match the lyrics because they sing it wrong in the movie. You know how these parodies work. Can’t have that. So you’ll have to drag out your CD and play along. Then again you should know how the song goes, especially once you start going through the words. I hope you enjoy it. Let me know what you think, and if you like it, please share it. Thank you very much. Oh, and, yes, the Trump lines are deliberate.

Everything’s Alt-right
Original words and music, “Everything’s Alright” by Tim Rice and Andrew Lloyd Webber, 1970
Additional lyrics by Wayne A. Schneider, 2017

Kellyanne Conway
Try not to get frenzied, try not to log onto
Forums that upset you so don’t you know
Everything’s alt-right yes Nazis online
And we want you to tweet well tonight
Let the world turn around you tonight
And the lies will get by so retweet all about them tonight

Steve Bannon
Everything’s alt-right yes everything’s alt-right yes

Kellyanne Conway
Tweet and it shall soothe you calm you then annoy you
Stir up your poor hothead so then you’ll see
Everything’s alt-right yes Nazis online
And they’re cool; your appointments, sweet
More the liars in your stead and fleet
Post your lies post your lies
Then relax think of Nazis tonight

Steve Bannon
Everything’s alt-right yes everything’s alt-right yes

The Thinking People Who See Trump For The Fraud He Is
Donald your appointments brand you an extremist
Could we be paced for a war?
Why are your days wasted? You could have placed maybe
Three hundred better people or more
People who aren’t angry people who aren’t raving
Matter more than your tweets and hair

Kellyanne Conway
Try not to get frenzied try not to log onto
Forums that upset you so don’t you know
Everything’s alt-right yes Nazis online
And we want you to sleep well tonight
Let the world turn around you tonight
And the lies will get by so retweet all about them tonight

Steve Bannon
Everything’s alt-right yes everything’s alt-right yes

Donald Trump
Surely you’re not saying we have the resources
To save the poor from their lot?
There will be poor always pathetically struggling –
Look at the good things you’ve got!
Think! while you still have me
Move! while you still see me
You’ll be lost and you’ll be so sorry when I’m gone

Kellyanne Conway
Tweet and it shall soothe you calm you then annoy you
Stir up your poor hothead so then you’ll see
Everything’s alt-right yes Nazis online
And they’re cool; your appointments, sweet
More the liars in your stead and fleet
Post your lies post your lies
Then relax think of Nazis tonight
Post your lies post your lies
Then relax think of Nazis tonight

All
Everything’s alt-right yes everything’s alt-right yes

Everything’s Alt-right (Reprise)
Original words and music, “Everything’s Alright” by Tim Rice and Andrew Lloyd Webber, 1970
Additional lyrics by Wayne A. Schneider, 2017

Kellyanne Conway
Try not to get frenzied try not to log onto
Forums that upset you so don’t you know
Everything’s alt-right yes Nazis online

Donald Trump
And I think I shall sleep well tonight
Let the world turn around me tonight

Kellyanne Conway
And the lies will get by so retweet all about them tonight

This is our daily open thread.