The Watering Hole; Friday July 31 2015; This Weeks Nutcasearrhea

I was originally going to place the week’s dumb in descending order from least dumb to totally dumb, but since these’re all on a precisely equal plane, they’re listed in no particular order. Note that once again, the titles pretty much say it all. If you should decide to click on any one of the links, I do, once again, recommend keeping a barf bucket nearby.

Michael Savage: Donald Trump Is ‘The Winston Churchill Of Our Time’

Self-Proclaimed Prophet: God Using Donald Trump To ‘Expose Darkness And Perversion’

Pat Robertson: Gays Can Become Straight If They ‘Start Acting Like Men’

Alabama governor names public school-hating Christian fundamentalist to oversee public education

Michael Savage: Obama May Seek A Third Term By ‘Nullifying The Election’

Rick Wiles: Obama Will ‘Slaughter Millions Of American Resistors’

Anti-gay Oregon baker thinks he’s defeating Satan — but his bigotry is actually helping Satanists

John McTernan: Gay Pride Events Cause Earthquakes, Abortion Causes Hurricanes

Louie Gohmert: Tens Of Millions Of Americans May Die Due To Iran Nuclear Deal

Cruz: Obama And Clinton ‘Snuggle Up To Radical Islamic Regimes Who Hate America’

There, That’s ten. Should keep everyone busy for at least a minute. Meanwhile, to assuage my guilt for posting the above links, here are three photos of critters with brains, with functioning minds — and clearly not a Republican amongst them!

Bright-eyed Grackle

Bright-eyed Grackle

Rocky Mountain High Chipmunk

Rocky Mountain High Chipmunk

Hummer Hovering

Hovering Hummer

There is clearly a huge difference between critters with small brains and critters with small minds! But we already knew that, right? Right!

OPEN THREAD

The Watering Hole; Friday July 10 2015; One Week, Two Worlds

Circa 1803, British poet William Blake wrote, in Auguries of Innocence, four lines which to this day invariably catch my eye and tweak my imagination.

To see a world in a grain of sand,
And a heaven in a wild flower,
Hold infinity in the palm of your hand,
And eternity in an hour.

He said a lot with those twenty-nine words about that other world, the world ‘out there’ that is within but still separate from the world ‘in here,’ the world where H. sapiens rules with both an iron fist and a shriveled soul.

So, to be brief, following are a handful of this last week’s episodic moments from each of the two realms. To my eye, there’s no question as to which allows an eternity in an hour and which does not, and the choice is extremely simple. Feel free to correct me if I’m wrong!

******

Last week in the world ‘Out There’

Reflection Idyll

Reflection Idyll

     Wild Thistle Flower and Buds

Wild Thistle Flower and Buds

Wild Buffalo Gourd Flowers

Wild Buffalo Gourd Flowers

Late last week while taking a leisurely stroll around a lake, I spotted a Cormorant standing on a rock some fifty yards from the shore. He looked photogenic, so I got the camera out and zoomed in on him, hoping he wouldn’t notice. Below are three shots: the first, a peaceful profile. He must have heard something, though, and started looking around. Then he caught me, barehanded, looked me square in the eye. I guess I must not have been perceived a threat, given that after a moment’s glance he looked away, stayed put on the rock, and continued with Cormorant routine business.

July 3 Cormorant triplet

The brief encounter with the Cormorant reminded me of something Robert Burns once wrote, words that pretty much summed up my impressions on the matter.

“Still thou art blest, compar’d wi’ me
The present only toucheth thee:
But, Och! I backward cast my e’e.
On prospects drear!
An’ forward, tho’ I canna see,
I guess an’ fear!”

(For more of the “guess an’ fear” option, see below)

******

Next up, a view of that other world, the one to which we have become slaves. No pix in or of this one — ain’t nothing much worth looking at anyway. Best to settle for only the words, and in the process be reminded that it’s too bad so many modern hominids (humanoids?) who so recklessly toss words around don’t have much if anything salient to say. Wonder why that is? Oh well, as someone once said, there are some things we’re just not meant to know. Anyway, here goes nothing. So to speak.

Last week in the world ‘In Here’

Trent Franks: Constitution Is ‘The Greatest Gospel Outreach The World Has Ever Known’

Linda Harvey: Prosecute Hillary Clinton For Gay ‘Child Corruption’

Cliff Kincaid: Gays In Military Show Influence Of Obama’s ‘Pedophile’ Mentor

Michael Savage: Liberals To Use Immigrant Gangs And Internment Camps To Kill Christians And Veterans

Michael Savage: Veterans Should Form Militia To Fight Obama

Rick Wiles: America Is Descending Into Hell

Ted Nugent: ‘Donald Trump Should Be Given The Medal Of Freedom’

‘Sodomites, Go To Hell!': Right-Wing July 4th Event Warns Hurricanes Create ‘Sodomite Heaven’

Ted Cruz: Gay Marriage Ruling Will Spark A ‘Raging Inferno’

Louie Gohmert: ISIS Right Across The Border

And finally, last but by no means least,

Mike Huckabee: America Worse Than Sodom After Gay Marriage Ruling

******

There. Both worlds essentially summed, albeit briefly. Still, methinks the message embedded is clear — to my eyes, at least.

July 8 thistle flower 1745

OPEN THREAD

The Watering Hole, Monday, June 22nd, 2015: That’s Crazy Talk!

Conspiracy theories fall into various categories: some are based on actual disastrous events that have in fact occurred, i.e., the attacks on September 11th, 2001, have spawned many conspiracy theories, some more fact-based than others; and some are based on projection of what the theorists imagine could happen. The website thecommonsenseshow.com caters to the latter.

Now, I realize that none of us here are fundamentalist religious nuts, but I don’t remember our hatred of the Bush/Cheney administration making any liberals go into full-on end- times/survivalist mode. But that is what appears to have happened to an unguessable number of conservatives due to the fact that President Barack Obama, a half-black man, is living in the “White” House. The “Common Sense Show” and website seem to go for a couple of different conspiracy theories rolled up in an unwieldy package. As one of the commenters at the site says, under one article titled “The UN Is Preparing to Manage Mass Casualty Events Under Jade Helm” (written by the website’s founder, Dave Hodges) “Please consider the following…”

“My worst fears are being realized. The following information is strongly suggestive that the United Nations is poised to seize control of Jade Helm. Further, the nature of UN involvement with Jade Helm is strongly suggestive of the fact that massive numbers of people will be relocated to camps following a chemical/biological attack. Further, this administration has established the protocols for just such a forced relocation of massive amounts of people.

We have seen the Blue Bell Ice Cream trucks, featured later in this article, that are implicated in this scenario for the presumed transport of a massive amounts of dead bodies. However, what is most disturbing is that in the case of a pandemic, the United Nations will assume operational control over quarantines and the transporting of “sick people” to a receiving facility. Walk with me through this process and I am certain you will agree the dots are beginning to connect which points to a hellish scenario in America’s immediate future. Let’s connect some dots.”

Among the weird examples of conspiratorial comments are these gems:

“It is time that people realize that Obama is the long awaited antichrist. Please consider the following….
No photos of a pregnant Michelle Obama exist anywhere. Attorney Orly Taitz can find no US birth records for the the daughters. On occasions an appendage can be seen through her clothing that indicates she has male genitals.

It is common knowledge Obama is gay and that two of his gay friends were murdered just before his nomination in 2007. The Book of Daniel says the Antichrist will be the leader of a powerful and diverse nation, that he will change times and laws, and also that he will have no desire of women.

See the shocking photos of Michelle’s male anatomy and read numerous prophecies from Jesus identifying Obama as the antichrist at http://revelation12.ca”

~~~

“In three more months nothing will matter anyway, I guess. Keep a BraveHeart and strengthen the perimeter. In Vietnam we had a procedure called “Final Protective Fire.” That was used when a firebase was about to be overrun and we threw everything great and small and all things in between down range at the enemy. We are rapidly approaching that point if your prediction of multiple attacks on multiple fronts proves true…and it will. Trouble is we don’t have a perimeter, we have isolated people willing to defend, but that doesn’t do squat to defeat the enemies that are approaching on all fronts. There is just too much heavily armed, heavily supported activity out there for this to be Training As Usual. All of us that are not willing to give up our Bibles, Faith, and Guns need to be making peace with the Man with a Crown of Thorns and Nail Scars in His Hands. We are going to be seeing him up up close and personal in the not too distant future when he stretches forth His right hand, calls us by name and raises us from the dead. Dead is what we are going to be very soon. Mentally/Spiritually toughen yourself folks and prepare for the Judgement Seat. Once He gives us a glorified body it will be ass kicking time and there will be no place to hide for the Globalists. Godspeed!”

~~~

“18 June, 2015, 21:47

Hey CNN just briefly switched their time stamp to military time… 01:00 This happened during Baltimore as well. Is that a signal to us about what is to come as a result of events happening during the switch?

Have you noticed that Obama is in a red hot rush to pass as many anti-American laws and other forms of legislation and regulation as he possibly can? No discussions-just what Obama wants rammed down our throats! No other president has ever done this-even those considered pure evil! Doesn’t Obama remind you of Damien in THE OMEN? Anyone who tried to stop him wound up dead!”

~~~

Now, here, to wash the nut-job taste out of your mouth:

Someone on a recent Raw Story thread commented that the Republicans needed a bigger clown car.  Someone else responded with, “They’re shopping for one,” and this photo:

Republicans shopping for a bigger clown car

Republicans shopping for a bigger clown car

Another commenter added this:

Tardis Clown Car

Tardis Clown Car

This is your daily Open Thread–go ahead, start discussing things.

The Watering Hole, Saturday, April 18th, 2015: This Week In Faux News

I was going to write about Rand Paul’s “Libertarian” followers, but thankfully Wayne steered me to PoliticusUSA’s “Friday Fox Follies”, which is a bit more entertaining. Well, that’s if by “entertaining” one means ‘laughing because screaming is the only other alternative.’

Rand Paul acolytes are NOT “entertaining”, by any definition in any dictionary on this or any other planet.

On the other hand, Friday Fox Follies, put together by Headly Westerfield, is a stupefying roundup of the past week’s non-stories, conspiracy theories, idiotic commentary and other nonsense, all hacked up from the fine folks at Fox “News.” This week, the Follies ‘2016 Presidential hopefuls’ edition’ provides links to anything and everything, from Media Matters’ Fox coverage, to Hillary Clinton and “Chipotleghazi” [term courtesy of Evan McMurray of Mediaite], to Jon Stewart ranting at the media**, to Bernie Sanders schooling Bill O’Reilly, to Donald Trump-or-Monkey [thank you, David Letterman, for linking those two forever in my mind.] There are so many links, you’re sure to find more than one story to pique the interest.

**Jon Stewart Watch: I’ve noticed for the last week or so, Jon has been using the first segment of his show to ream, eviscerate, and generally rant about various topics, including his amazing tirade about Dick Cheney. I think that Jon is taking advantage of the time his show has left to really get everything off his chest, in his own inimitable style. The “real news media” should sit up and pay attention, because Jon seems to be pointing in their direction.

This is our daily Open Thread – have at it!

The Watering Hole; Thursday November 21 2013; “An Issue With God”

I have to admit I had a good laugh at Glenn Beck’s freakout the other day over Obama’s recitation of Lincoln’s Gettysburg Address. Obama was apparently asked to recite Lincoln’s original draft, aka the “Nicolay Version,” which did not contain the words “under God” — and predictably the right wing pundits went nuts. Glenn Beck predictably shouted that Obama intentionally left the phrase out because, in Beck’s words, “The man has an issue with God,” and “he is changing our history, he is changing our traditions.”

Ah, well, if only it were true. Imposition of religious belief by one faction on or via the nation’s government is a travesty of huge proportion, and those who do so demand are, indeed, the ones engaged in the apparent never-ending process of “changing our history, . . . changing our traditions.” And yes, it’s a widespread truism that a great many Americans (myself among them) do indeed have “an issue with God,” and would really appreciate it if believers would simply agree to practice their beliefs to their hearts’ content — in their homes, their churches — and graciously allow the rest of us the privilege of practicing that which WE care to believe with similar freedom, all with no dogmatic imposition — via any official permission or authority — of any theological premise on the citizenry entire. Period.

In any case, Beck’s freakout based on his vapid thesis that Obama has “an issue with God,” reminded me of something I wrote many years ago, a poem which essentially defined MY “issue with God” in the context of efforts by so many to impose their narrow view on the expansive view of so many. So. Just for today, I dedicate the following to Glenn Beck and all other right wing nutcases who can’t comprende any potential reality that lies elsewhere than in the (scant!) gray matter implicit between the ears of the insufferably narrow minded! Hi Glenn!

THE GODMAN AND THE SKEPTIC

A Discourse
Dedicated to Creationists everywhere
And their adversaries

 (1989)

A godman and a skeptic met
To promulgate their views,
With godman’s premise, Genesis,
And skeptic’s, more the muse.

“God made the heavens and the Earth!”
The passioned godman says,
“And, furthermore, He did all this,
In only seven days!”

“But whence came God?” the skeptic asked,
With some temerity,
The godman said, “Don’t question that,
For such is blasphemy! “

The skeptic glowered for a time,
Then asked, “How old’s the Earth?”
“Six thousand years!” the godman said,
“Including day of birth!

“With firmaments united, then,
The Earth was paradise,
Where beasts and fields, and finally men,
Enjoyed all without vice!

“And God made Adam first, then Eve,
Who were, as you shall see,
Progenitors of all mankind,
Of all humanity!

“For from their loins came many sons,
Who married, then produced,
Our father’s father’s ancestors,
As, biblically, deduced!

“Thus, all the Earth is born of God!
And man’s the child of Eve!
So, lie thee down in prostrate form
And hail the Lord! Believe!”

Then godman smiled, smug, and secure
His theses were correct,
For Genesis came straight from God,
In veritas, direct.

“Oh, I believe,” the skeptic said,
“Though not the way you think,
From what I’ve heard, the Universe
Arrived in just a wink.

“A coalescing, then a flash,
And galaxies were cleaved
From ether, dust, and energy,
If science be believed.

“Five billion years, or ten, or twelve
Had passed, when life arrived,
And finally men, though not like us,
From lower forms derived.

“And, furthermore, a question, sir,
About the sons of Eve,
Whence came the daughters, for her sons,
Mankind, therefrom, conceived?”

The godman cringed and raised his hand
Toward heaven, in disgust,
“If those are your beliefs, my friend,
You’ll burn in hell, please trust.

“For God, I know, has no rapport
With those who pray to see
The wisdom He withholds from men
For all eternity.”

“Your last remark makes little sense,”
Said skeptic, feigning dread,
“If you are asking we believe
God deems our brains be dead.

“For, if somewhere in endless space
A Creator exists
Who gave us minds to seek out truth,
Then why should we resist?”

The godman’s face showed beads of sweat,
He offered no reply,
He simply stared toward heaven’ s void
As wispy clouds rolled by.

May heathen burn, the godman prayed,
They’re evil, stubborn men,
And Lord, as why you sent them here?
Well, that’s beyond my ken.

Perhaps to try me, for a time,
Before I’m laid to rest?
Convert some souls to heaven’s song?
Yes, likely that’s my test.

But sure it is now’s not the time
To use the Holy See
As evidence, Your true intent,
Thy Word’s inerrancy.

Then godman turned toward skeptic, sad,
This man, his nemesis,
Would not accept such grand design,
God’ s apotheosis.

“We’ll meet again, my wayward friend,
By then, perhaps, you’ll learn,
That only through the Word of God,
In hell’s fire, you won’t burn!”

“I doubt it, sir,” the skeptic said,
“For you’ve confirmed my choice,
That words beyond the biblical
Can speak with reasoned voice.

“And, too, you see, I have no need
To live in metaphor,
I’d rather seek, expand my mind,
Maintain an open door.

“To blindly mimic premises
Is not what God has deemed;
It seems more likely He mandates
That light, from dark, be gleaned,

“And so, my friend, while I suggest
That your beliefs you keep,
Accept your God views men as lambs,
Though not, I think, as sheep.”

Then skeptic turned and walked away,
Face bent as if to smile,
Safe Genesis was put to bed,
If but for just awhile.

Amen.

OPEN THREAD; DISCUSS, FREAKOUT, WHATEVER

Obama was asked to read the very first draft of the speech which did not include – See more at: http://www.rightwingwatch.org/content/beck-hops-bandwagon-obama-has-issue-god#sthash.veUJ0S0J.dpuf
Obama was asked to read the very first draft of the speech which did not include – See more at: http://www.rightwingwatch.org/content/beck-hops-bandwagon-obama-has-issue-god#sthash.veUJ0S0J.dpuf
Obama was asked to read the very first draft of the speech which did not include – See more at: http://www.rightwingwatch.org/content/beck-hops-bandwagon-obama-has-issue-god#sthash.veUJ0S0J.dpuf

The Watering Hole, Monday, October 7th, 2013: All the Crazy That Fits

It’s been a while since I put on my hip waders and stepped into Newsmax, so here’s a few gems:

From “Rev. Billy Graham Prepares ‘Perhaps … My Last Message’” by David A. Patton:

“In an exclusive interview, the Rev. Billy Graham tells Newsmax that President Obama’s “hope and change” mantra is nothing more than a cliché and warns that the nation faces increasing threats to civil and religious liberties from its government.

Graham, who is preparing for possibly his last crusade, this time via video, said America is drenched in a “sea of immorality” and suggested that the second coming of Christ is “near.”

“Our early fathers led our nation according to biblical principles,” Graham wrote in response. “‘Hope and change’ has become a cliché in our nation, and it is daunting to think that any American could hope for change from what God has blessed,” he stated, an obvious reference to President Obama’s campaign motto.

“Our country is turning away from what has made it so great,” he continued, “but far greater than the government knowing our every move that could lead to losing our freedom to worship God publicly, is to know that God knows our every thought; he knows our hearts need transformation.” ~~~

Many believing Christians believe in a coming Armageddon, a final battle between good and evil prophesied in the book of Revelation.

Graham tells Newsmax it is not wise to “speculate” about the dates of such a battle, but he adds that the Bible says that there “will be signs pointing toward the return of the Lord.”

“I believe all of these signs are evident today,” Graham wrote, adding that “the return of Christ is near.

“Regardless of what society says, we cannot go on much longer in the sea of immorality without judgment coming,” he says.”

Next, from “Rove: Obama Wants to ‘Break the Republicans'” by Amy Woods:

“Republican strategist Karl Rove on Sunday described President Barack Obama’s behavior throughout the budget showdown as “stubborn obstructionism” whose goal is to “get more money and break the Republicans.”

“The stubborn obstructionism of the president … has a purpose, which is to try and get the Congress to agree to the Senate Democrats’ spending number, which is $91 billion bigger than the House, and bust the sequester, and end the 2011 spending agreements,” Rove said on “Fox News Sunday.” “He is attempting to put the responsibility for raising the debt ceiling and, in fact, naming the amount of the debt ceiling on the Congress and not on himself.”

Third, from “Rand Paul: Democrats’ Stubbornness Keeping Government Closed” by Sandy Fitzgerald:

“Paul denied that House Republicans led to the shutdown by refusing to fund the government.

“The House Republicans said they would fund all of government, and they did,” Paul said. “They funded all of government short of one program. So they really were never wanting to shut down government over this, they were wanting to fund government, and then have a debate.”

He further blamed Obama for his refusal to negotiate for the shutdown.

“When you say the president wants 100 percent of Obamacare or he will shut down the government, that’s exactly what happened,” said Paul. “If he [Obama] doesn’t get 100 percent of his way – his way or the highway – then they won’t do any spending bills that don’t include everything that he wants. That’s him unwilling to negotiate, that’s him being unwilling to compromise.”

Had enough? How about one more? From “Rep. Graves: Obama To Blame if Country Defaults” by Amy Woods:

“Georgia Republican Rep. Tom Graves said Sunday the party is “united” in its belief the government should re-open and negotiations with Democrats should continue to avoid a possible economic default over the debt ceiling.

“We have had a tremendous fight over keeping the government open and protecting Americans from Obamacare,” Graves said on “Fox News Sunday.” “There’s no reason to default. The president’s the only one demanding default right now.”

Sorry, but I have to throw this last link in, just for laughs: Another one by Bill Hoffman, “From Senate to Center Stage: Fred Thompson Makes Broadway Debut”. The author of the piece completely omits any mention of Thompson’s disastrous run for the Presidency, or the fact that Thompson’s most recent “acting” gig has been on ‘Reverse-Mortgage’ commercials.

This is our Open Thread. Have at it!

Sunday Roast: Veruca Salt Award-Jennifer Rubin

Washington Post Blogger Jennifer Rubin has earned herself the Veruca Salt Award. She is notoriously unable to deal with facts she hasn’t invented herself. So small wonder when someone contradicts her introducing such facts she channels Veruca Salt and asks for the person to be muted.

Congratulations Mrs Rubin, this is not really the Pulitzer, but as close to an award on your “journalistic” work you’ll ever get.

This is our Open Thread. Join in.