The Watering Hole: Wednesday, October 9, 2013: Armageddon at Minus 8 Days and Counting.

Good News! The End of The World is Nigh!

In just eight more days, the United States of America will not have enough money to pay for all of its obligations. Technically, the world’s greatest superpower will be bankrupt.

This is going to really tick off a lot of people: China, Europe, Israel, all those countries we gave foreign aid to so they could buy U.S. made arms and seeds from Monsanto. Basically everybody who got any kind of benefit, directly or indirectly, from the U.S. Goverment.

Just think, no more government subsidies to Big Oil and Agribusiness. Oh, and all those Red States that received more in federal dollars than they paid to the U.S. Treasury? Not any more.

But the really good news, according to no less an authority than Michelle Bachman, is the end of the world. That’s right. Jesus himself will come down and all of His True Believers will be Raptured and go to heaven. And not a moment too soon.

With all those evangelical christians finally out of the way, the rest of us can get to work cleaning up the mess they’ve made of this planet.

OPEN
THREAD

(new post below)

The Watering Hole: Wednesday, October 5, 2011.

This past weekend a group of “delegates” held a “Constitutional Convention” in the Bohemian Grove, a coastal redwood forest near the tiny town of Monte Rio, California.

Headed by none other than former Governor Sarah Palin, the group set about on a monumental task of rewriting the Constitution of the United States of America. Sources reveal their plan is to introduce their new Constitution shortly after Republicans regain control of the Senate and the White House, together with control of the legislatures of 38 States, ensuring its passage.

Eyewitnesses report the Grove had various notable politicos and various influential guests arriving and departing at all hours of the day and night, including brief visits by Michelle Bachmann, the Koch Brothers, Ann Coulter, Mitt Romney and Ginther, a local stand-up comic that does Al Jolsen imitations with a Southern German accent.

After the “Constitutional Convention” wrapped up, local dumpster divers, looking for left-over filet mignon, lobster and abalone, discovered a copy of their final-revised-completed-top-top-top-secret menu, as well as the handwritten copy of our next Constitution.

We, here at The Zoo, have spared no expense to bring this highly sensitive, potentially politically explosive document to you, our beloved Readers.

PREAMBLE

We, the Citizens of this Great God-Given Land, in order to form a more Perfect Union between us and Our Lord and Savior, and to prepare the way for His Coming, as He has promised us He would, do hereby adopt this Constitution of the Citizens United States of America.

ARTICLE 1

Congress.

Congress is useless, and a waste of taxpayer’s money. All laws shall be proposed by the United Citizens of this Great Country by posting them online on Facebook, or other such similar website as the President may declare from time to time. Those proposed laws that receive the most votes shall become law, unless of course, the President disagrees, in which case it shall not become a law, but it will be deemed a good idea anyway.

ARTICLE 2

The President.

The President is God’s Representative here on earth. He, or She, reigns supreme over the land, and the fighting forces, and all the animals and plants and birds and fishes and natural resources.
The President shall be elected by a direct vote of the people eligible to vote, that is, white men who own property, just as our Founding Fathers wanted. All votes shall be tabulated by Deibold voting machines, or by such similar machines as a successor company shall make. Votes shall be counted according to the net worth of the voter.

ARTICLE 3

The Judiciary.

The Courts shall deal with criminal matters only. People with civil disputes should resolve them before God, not a judge.

ARTICLE 4

Full Faith and Credit.

We put our Full Faith and Credit in God. All previous debts and obligations incurred by the United States when it was in the throes of pagan, heathen, secular-humanist, liberals are hereby refudiated.

ARTICLE 5

Taxes.

None.

ARTICLE 6

Amendments to this Constitution.

Ain’t gonna happen.

ARTICLE 7

Marriage.

Gay people can’t get married.

ARTICLE 8

Guns.

People can buy all the guns and ammo they can afford.

ARTICLE 9

Abortion.

See Article 6.

Oh, and all the previous laws of the United States are hereby declared null and void and to no effect whatsoever. And States, you can do whatever you want as long as you don’t want to do anything that’s not allowed by this Constitution.

This is our Open Thread. Speak Up!

“CO2 is a natural byproduct of nature!” So is shit, honey…

The Crazy Bachmann does it again!  😆

HT:  ThinkProgress

UPDATE:  Rep Earl Blumenauer (D-OR) smacks Bachmann for her idiocy:

My good friend, the gentlelady from Minnesota, doesn’t think there are any problems with the concentration of carbon dioxide in the atmosphere. It’s interesting to listen to her say that something that was naturally occurring simply couldn’t be harmful, ignoring the fact that we have the highest concentrations of carbon dioxide in the atmosphere for 2/3 of a million years.

If you think about it for a minute, it’s obvious this is a problem, but having the science to back it up makes it rather devastating.

Oops, I said “think” in regard to Michelle Bachmann.  Nevermind…

HT: The Wonk Room at ThinkProgress

Michelle Bachmann’s Blues

This is a great article by Katrina Vanden Heuvel at The Nation, it gives an update in this Minnesota race.

Ever since Minnesota Republican Congresswoman Michele Bachmann’s poisonous comments on Hardball ten days ago, it has looked increasingly possible that her deep red district might turn blue next week.

Her Democratic-Farmer-Labor (DFL) party opponent, Elwyn Tinklenberg, a former mayor and state transportation commissioner, has raised more than $1.5 million since Bachmann channeled Joe McCarthy on MSNBC. The Washington Post reported today that Tinklenberg’s fundraising “in a single week, is more than what any other Democratic challenger has raised in a fundraising quarter in the entire two-year election cycle.”

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Michelle Bachmann (R-MN): Congress should be investigated for being Un-American UPDATED

Michele Bachmann (R-MN), one of the crazier members of Congress, says members of Congress, whose philosophies she does not share, should be investigated by the media as being un-American.

This is just over one minute of a longer segment of Ms. Bachmann on Hardball just moments ago.  If the entire segment becomes available, it will be posted.

The full clip is below the fold, as well as a response from an Obama surrogate Katrina Vanden Heuvel, editor of The Nation.

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