The Watering Hole: Wednesday, January1, 2016: I’m Briseadh na Faire, and I’m running for President, Part VII

I’m Briseadh na Faire, and I’m running for President. Here are a few of my positions on issues important to the American People today. Between now and November 2016, I will post additional policy and platform statements.

Today’s topic du jour: State of the Union – yeah, right.

I know, I know. By the time you read this, Obama will have given his last State of the Union Address as President of the United States, blah, blah, blah. He will have put a positive spin on all things Obama, all things black, all things from Kenya. And Fox “News” will have unleashed a barrage showing exactly how incompetent and impotent the Reign of Obama has been, replete with quotes from every Republican candidate from Palin to Trump. (FYI, Palin has never, I repeat never stopped running for President of these here United States.)

The penultimate question is, and always will be: “are you better off now than you were before Obama became President?”

The only possible answer is a resounding “NO!!!”

Before Obama became President, we had hope. Hope for change. Hope for a future better than that of our parents. Now, as we approach the end of his eight-year reign as our supreme leader, we are that much older, that much wiser.

We’re still at war in the middle east – only the name of our enemy has changed from Saddam and Al Qaeda and the Taliban to ISIS or ISIL and Al Qaeda and the Taliban. We’re fighting in Syria now, and Iran is still an open question. Iraq? Forget it. It’s a lost cause. As is Afghanistan. Maybe the oil pipeline is safe, but for sure their heroin production is hitting all-time highs (no pun intended).

Ok, so how about here at home? You feel the boost in the economy from the bazillions in bailout money given to the same banksters that robbed us? Neither did I. Nor anyone else making less than, say, a million a year.

Let’s face it, the only thing we got from eight years of Obama was ObamaCare. Republicans can’t repeal it. The Supreme Court didn’t overturn it. We’re stuck with it. It’s a massive gift to the insurance industry, which wrote much of it. But is it Universal Health Care? No. Medicare for all? No. Just another way for insurance companies to skim their profits off of our health care dollars without improving our health care at all. I know, Republicans created this Boogey Monster of “Government Death Panels” and all. But the reality is that private health insurance companies do that every day, every time they deny a claim, deny a treatment recommended by your doctor, to maximize their profits.

Don’t get me wrong. Obama has done some good.  He refused to prosecute Bush and company for war crimes and crimes against humanity. God knows he had enough evidence in the public record to convict at least some of the previous administration. But by not prosecuting his predecessors he let the whole world know that the United States of America will act with impunity when it comes to invading countries under false pretexts for the sole purpose of changing their government; that we will torture people with impunity; that we will kidnap people, and hold them in prison forever, without charges, without due process, because we are, above all things, a Nation of Laws, a Nation of Freedom, a Nation of Liberty. Which is why, of course, terrorists hate us.

So, come 2016, vote Briseadh na Faire for President. I’m the only candidate for President who knows what’s best for America; the only candidate who acknowledges up front that I will break each and every one of my campaign promises, and, when I do, you won’t be disappointed!

I’m Briseadh na Faire, and I approve this message.

[BriseadhNaFaireforPresidentisnotaffiliatedwithanyPolitcalActionCommitteenorhas receivedtheendorcementofTPZoonoranyotherindividualbusinessnonprofitorganizationorgod.]

OPEN THREAD

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The Watering Hole: Wednesday, February 29, 2012: Captain Kirk to vie for RNC nomination!

William Shatner, best known for his role as Captain Kirk of the United Federation of Planets Starship Enterprise, issued a press release this leap day announcing his intent to seek the Republican Nomination for President, in the event none of the current candidates go into the RNC Convention with the nomination locked up.

“I look at it this way,” Shatner said in a recent interview,

Nobody in the current Republican field has more foreign policy experience than I do. I was battling Klingons and Romulans while Santorum was still in grade school. And Romney may be a captain of industry, but I was Captain of a Starship. Romney led Bain Capital that bought up companies and bankrupted them. I helped take a defunct science fiction TV series to a successful franchise that had multiple successful spin-offs and created numerous jobs.

I will lead the Republican Party, and this Country into the future. The Republican Party ended slavery. I had the first inter-racial kiss on TV.

I have dealt with illegal aliens on a galactic scale, and I always win.

When it comes to the economy, who…has a better reputation than…me … “THE … NEGOTIATOR” for the best rates for flights and lodging…anywhere!

And … like that Great Republican, Ronald Reagan, I … too … am a movie star. But where Reagan co-starred with a monkey, I … co-starred with a Vulcan. That’s gotta count…for….something.

Shatner’s announcement, coming on the heels of Super Tuesday, caught the Republican establishment totally off-guard. When asked for comment, Santorum said, “Captain Who?” Romney said “I’m good friends with the producers of Star Trek.” Ron Paul said, “Why do we need a Federation of Planets, anyway?” And Newt Gingrich said “Shatner’s a bad actor from a bad TV series that would lead our country in the wrong direction. I’m the only candidate who has promised to build a base on the Moon, because I know that obelisque is up there in the Tycho Crater.”

Sarah Palin issued a press release of her own stating, “Bill Shatner’s no big deal. I can see space from my front porch in Alaska!”

THIS IS OUR OPEN THREAD. ENJOY “LEAP DAY”. WOMEN, THIS IS YOUR CHANCE: GO OUT AND PROPOSE TO SOMEONE TONIGHT!

The Watering Hole: Wednesday, 2-22-12: A Limerick for Your Thoughts?

The candidate Richard Santorum,
Touts the ’vangelical forum;
He’d ban birth control,
With great vitriol,
To women who like sex, he’d whore’m.

Mitt Romney is just such a blast,
Once you get over his past,
He’s on every side,
Like the ever-changing tide,
Schizophrenic’s the role he’s been cast.

Now Newt Gingrich, what can I say?
Shut the government down in his day.
It’s not his fault,
He rubs wounds with salt,
And derides all who stand in his way.

Libertarians stand by Ron Paul,
And surely he gave them his all,
Legalize pot,
Smoke all you got,
But his poll numbers still fall.

The drop-outs are there by the score,
Cain, Palin, and Bachmann and more,
Perry said “Oops”
While Palin did loops,
And Cain’s 9-9-9 hit the floor.

Dear Friends, here’s the GOP pool,
Each one sounds a 1 percent tool,
But lest you should dread,
Tis our Open Thread,
Where Comments are really quite cool.

The Wartering Hole, Wednesday, February 1, 2012: Money Wins in Florida Primary!

“Do you know what I intend? I intend to be a king in a big palace and when I go out in my coach, all the people will wave and I will shout at them, and…and…in the summertime I will go to my summer palace and I’ll wear my crown in swimming and everything, and all the people will cheer and I will shout at them… What do you mean I can’t be king? Nobody should be kept from being a king if he wants to be one. It’s usually just a matter of knowing the right people.. ..well…. if I can’t be a king, then I’ll be very rich then I will buy myself a kingdom. Yes, I will buy myself a kingdom and then I’ll kick out the old king and take over the whole operation myself. I will be head king.” Mitt Romney, age 5.

(with apologies to Charles Schultz)

This Be the Open Thread O’The Day.

The Watering Hole: Wednesday, …….December 28, 2011……. …..Hump DayyaD pmuH…..

Well, another year, shot to hell. Obama’s still the President, much to the chagrin of Christian Extremists. Osama bin Laden is dead, much to the chagrin of Christian Extremists.

Obamacare is still the law of the land; the government didn’t get shut down; and Republicans have gone on record supporting tax breaks for the very, very rich at the expense of everyone else.

Occupy Wall Street sprang out of nowhere and put the issue of the disparity of wealth, opportunity and power in the forefront of the news. Whether the movement will gain any traction going into the coming primaries and fall election remains to be seen. For now, it is enough that the ruling class has called out their police forces to put down the movement with violence, while letting Teabaggers attend protests bearing sidearms and assault rifles.

The battle lines are being drawn. It’s the age-old battle between altruism and selfishness. Just think, in a little more than 11 months, God will come and call the game on account of Judgment Day.

Or not.

This is our open thread.

O pen, opine,

or pen

a pun.

Whatever.

The Watering Hole: Wednesday, December 21, 2011: Happy Solstice!

The Business Man and His Three Employees

a modern parable

by

Briseadh na Faire

The Teacher sat in the tall grass near a quiet river, facing his small group of young students. “Tell us about Heaven” one of them said. “Yes. Yes. Tell us about Heaven” the group chimed in eager unison.

The Teacher looked at his young charges and began.

“Heaven is like, well, it’s a lot like here” he began. “Take a business man. He’s successful. He runs the show. Everyone must do exactly what he wants, or they’ll be fired, tossed out on the street.”

“So, one day, there’s this business man, and he’s going away on a long trip.”

“To China?” a boy interrupted. “My daddy goes to Chinaa lot. He says it’s for business. Mommy says he has a Chinese mistress.”

“What’s a mistress” another boy asked.

“It’s like a second mommy” a girl asserted, “one your real mommy doesn’t like very much.”

“Ok” the Teacher brought his charges back to paying attention again “to China. And he calls in three of his top employees. To the first one, he gives a stack of ten thousand-dollar bills. ‘I want you to take care of this. It’s ten thousand dollars, and I’ll want a strict accounting when I get back.’ To the second he gave five thousand dollars, and to the third, a thousand dollars, each with the same warning.”

“Then the business man went off on his trip. A year later, he returned.” Continue reading

The Watering Hole: Wednesday December 14, 2011

The Three Kingdoms
a modern parable
by
Briseadh na Faire

The land was divided into three Kingdoms, and their Kings continually vied among each other for whose Kingdom was the best in all the land. Each had nobles. Each had workers. Each had poor and destitute. They all shared the same joys, the same problems. And they all ruled as their fathers, and their fathers before them, had ruled: appease the nobles, let the workers receive fair recompense for their labors, and care for the sick, the poor and destitute.

The Kings, everyone thought, ought to be happy. But they weren’t. They wanted something more, but they didn’t know what. And so they met and enjoyed a fine meal, and talked about their mutual discontent.

At last, the first came to a decision. “I want to be feared.” He proclaimed. “If I am feared, my people will carry out my wishes, and I will rule with an iron hand. I will use whatever means are at my disposal to make my Kingdom the best in the land!” He smashed his fist onto the table and sat back down.

“I want to be loved.” rose the second King. “I shall use whatever resources I have to aid and help my subjects, so that I will be the most beloved King in all the land. Then my Kingdom will be the best in the land.” He drank from his wine goblet and sat.

Eyes turned on the third King. He sat for awhile, idly pushing the remnants of his dinner around on his plate for a bit. He then looked at the other two and spoke softly, without rising. “I do not wish to be feared” he said, “nor do I care if my subjects love me. I just want them to grow and thrive and be happy.” And with that, he set his plate on the floor, and let his dog eat the scraps.

Each King retired to his own Kingdom, to return in a year. Continue reading